2013 Review Retrospective

Hello, Spongey here.

Our retrospectives have officially begun and now that we’ve gotten the past the shakey start of 2012, it’s time to dive into year Two. If you ask me, 2013 is my best year. I got a lot better as a critic and was able to judge things more fairly, and I got an established scheduled. Granted, every 4 days wasn’t the best but I managed to do it.

Once I got going, I had a lot of energy on this blog and did so much interesting content. I had a nice mix, doing more decent films including a few favorites. I did some projects I wanted to do and really broadened my horizon.

Granted, I still had my fair share of mistakes but I do think this was my best year in general. It’s kind of some TV Shows, Season 1 is rocky but decent, Season 2 is easily the best due to just getting better, Season 3 is not quite as good, but still very good, and 4 is a disappointment.

I’m not sure where I’m going with this metaphor. Now, at the end of the year I did list of my favorite posts of the year, so I kind of covered them before. With this, I’ll copy/past most of what I said, and maybe add more.

The only reviews I am leaving out are 16 Wishes (due to being a remake of a 2012 review) and the NFL Rush Zone reviews, since I covered them with my original reviews.

With that said, let’s dive into it.

This, is the 2013 Retrospective

Diary of a Wimpy Kid Trilogy

We start with a series of reviews that is best done at once. And one I covered in my List. That was fast. First, the gist of what I said there:

I’ve done a lot of personal reviews, and this is….one of them. It’s not a book series I really grew up with or anything. I just really got into it, and that’s why the 3rd movie got to me as much as it did.

.I liked the 3rd review cuz I did have some decent jokes and of the feels thing. But I think the first review was the best. I just loved how I compared it to the book in every way and really dived into Greg’s character and all that.

I thought writing was, this one of my best. I articulated myself pretty well when it comes to all aspects of this film. It is said that I seem to be only person who sees these movies as good. On a critical level, this has plenty to offer yet I think the 3rd has the WORST RT rating, even though it’s clearly the best…to an extent

It goes back to having deep themes after part 2 just had brother issues. But ah well, at least reviewing Mr Coat liked it. Unlike that…one angry guy who reviews movies in the back of a car with some other guy I think I know.

Also, like I said, Roger Ebert loved the first one a lot. That is awesome. R.I.P., dude.

Anyway, I had fun going into the differences and how they work in the films favor. I think the first review captured that the most, hence why it’s the best.

But I did like the 3rd review a lot due to the ending. Also, this was my very first post of the year. Needless to say, 2013 started with a bang.

This review was clearly one of the ones I put the most effort into and it shows. By the way, the warning about how I say “in the book” a lot was half joking, half real. I know some hate it when reviews like this compare it to the movie, so that warning may mean something for some people.

…This was a very solid review that showed that when I do read the book, I can get a solid review out of it. “

There’s not a lot to add here. (Except that I do own 3 now). It was fun doing these films. I had a few positive reviews in 2013 of films I had seen before and I think I can be good at positive reviews if I’ve seen the film before so I can explain in detail why they work.

And since not too many care about these films, it’s more fun.

I will admit the films objectively are a bit lesser than I claim, but I do think they are solid family films. On their own they are simple decent but they do try to have decent stories for the most part.

I have a few side notes for this one. I didn’t plan on each review being the first for that month but I caught on and planned for the 3rd one to pan out that way. It’s weird seeing Karan Bar and Peyton List show up together a while before Jessie was a thing. Kind of makes Chirag lusting overly briefly very….creepy in hindsight.

So yeah, as I said before, these reviews were quite fun to do and served as a solid way to start the year. We can move on now.

Happy Feet Two

Here’s a review I tend to forget about, since the film itself doesn’t leave an impression. It’s just a typical mediocre sequel that makes the characters less interesting and has a bit too much going on, being more cliché then the first.

I’ve forgotten most of this film since the review honestly. It tries a lot harder than most weak sequels and some of it is enjoyable, but it’s just a weak sequel. I’m not sure what you could do to make a good Happy Feet sequel, but this didn’t cut it.

Although I will always remember the sexually ambiguous krill. NEVER FORGET.

There isn’t a lot to say about the review. It’s fine with the usual good moments, but the film it self being regrettable leads to this not being my most memorable work. I had plenty to work with at the time, so I wasn’t slouching at least.

I showed decent reviewing skills here too. It’s just not a review I come back to since the film is not special enough for me to care to recall it’s low lights. Nothing wrong with the review, just nothing too special in the end.

But when you do this many review, some just won’t be memorable. That’s all I got, really.

Antz

This one is interesting, as this was part of a Martathon. I tried a Dreamworks-a tho which failed because I got lazy. But for the first entry, I wanted to do it play by play to better explain my feelings on the film.

It was an odd experiment. As for the marathons, I plan to just do “A Look” type things in place of them from this point on. But back to Antz. I’m willingly to give it some slack as it was their first film, and there wasn’t too much to compare it to back them.

But I still think it’s fairly weak. It’s too generic to be interesting, it tries too hard to be adult, and the charecters and story are just weak. But at least the animation and casting are solid, and it at least tries to tell a real story.

At this point, any sign of effort is amazing to me.

But hey, they all can’t be Toy Story, I guess. We all gotta start somewhere. With the review, I maybe harped on the cliches too but everything else is spot on enough. This is another I wouldn’t call my best, but I did have more good critiquing in this one.

So I’d call it a good one. It’s odd that it belongs to a canned marathon but ah well. Not a bad one overall.

Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay

Here’s another fun positive review. This came about because I saw it, thinking it would be terrible based on what I had heard, but ended up enjoying it. I had interesting reasons for liking it so a while later I reviewed it to explain my feelings.

And I still like it. It is the weakest of the trilogy, but it’s still good. It mostly keeps a lot of the humor and has some good social commentary on top of good development. Like I said in the review, it has some force jokes and weak elements, but as a whole it is a worthy sequel.

Plus, need I mention Ron Fox?

The review is a pretty good one. I’m more critical here, explaining what works and what doesn’t. I explain why pretty well, and even put in some amusing moments regarding my worship of Ron Fox.

It’s another one showing my skills fairly well, which is more impressive since most people wouldn’t have a ton to say about this movie. It is sometimes hard reviewing good comedies, but I think I did okay here.

Of course it’s not my best take on the franchise, but we’ll get to that one later.

Phineas and Ferb Across the 2nd Dimension

Yeah, I’ll have to mostly skip this one as I’ve rambled about film plenty, and this was another entry on the list. Here’s the gist of that entry:

Reviewing this movie was odd. I’ve done movies i’ve already seem, but at the most I will have seen it like 2 or 3 times. But this is one I had seen many times, and had pretty much memorized most of it when I reviewed it.

Hell, I actually did a general review of it on blogger when it came out. But that was a bit after I saw it, and this was long after the fact.

Anyway, in spite of the bad spelling, this was a solid review. At every step, I explained the characters and what makes the movie work.

…But back to my original point, I knew this movie front to back already and it felt different from my other reviews. Even if it’s based on something I knew, I still fell like I’m doing a real movie.

But since I’ve seen it so much AND I’ve discussed P&F so much, it felt odd…in a good way. I tried to still make it seem like I’m doing an actual movie, with a look at the themes, and the “voiced by ___”.

By the way, this is just an aside, but the guy who voices Baljeet recently came out as gay…No comment.

Anyway, it was a lot of fun to quote the jokes and discuss the themes and all that. This is one of the few times I reviewed a movie off a DVD, by the way. The other times were Wimpy 1 and 2, and Shrek 3.

This was simply a very passionate review, and I think it went over well. Like I said, it’s full of errors but I still like how analyzed everything and put aside my more fanboy-ish love for it to think critically.

Though some may feel the grade is a bit high. To clarity, it’s an A as far as P&F goes. For those who watched this not knowing the show, it’s a very strong B+.

I just feel it has everything the show had, and more. Great humor, adult references, complex characters, and some really emotional stuff.

Also, I’m proud of that “MYSTERIOUS FORCE COMPELS YOU” joke. I’ve used it in other discussions about the movie, but I never get tired of it. But here’s a fun thing: I have a tumblr called “Re-watching Phineas and ferb” where I went through every ep and just did bullet points as I watched, quoting stuff, and making “witty” comments on the ep as I re-visited it.

I did this movie that way. So yes, I had already been very familiar with this movie through that before I reviewed it. But while I was reviewing it, I tried to not make that too obvious.

I feel this review captures the film’s good-ness pretty well. I think someone did a At2d review in this style back when it came out, and it’s good too. I just wanted to do my own spin. This review was fun to do and it seems like it turned out well”

Not too much to add to that, except that since then I did The Muppets and Sponge out of Water off a Dvd, with one planned. I do own some films I reviewed, but I got them after the fact like Madagascar 1 and 2, and Epic.

Also, this review came out during a sort of Marathon of P&F posts on the blog so this was really just a way to use my obsession for something really productive. I think it turned out mostly fine.

But yeah, there isn’t much to add from everything I’ve said at this point. Except that I plan to get more familiar with the film by counting it’s sins on a different tumblr I have. Yeah. Let’s move on.

Shark Tale

I did this one to make up for how Dreamworks-a thon failed. I had the idea to this film probably since I started, and I’m glad I finally got to do it. Doug Walker’s little Dreamworks coverage added to it at as well.

Dreamworks was well known for weaker kid films, but even this was so below them. Even Antz and Home had more creativity to them. I can tell most of the writers and artists were trying their best and there were some inspired moments.

But despite a few decent ideas and moments, this movie is just….wow. Most of Dreamworks project at least try to have something aside from the pop culture crap but still is just…bad. There are so many pointless references and puns, with wasted celebrities and a nonsensical world.

I will say that it at least tells a story and Jack Black’s side had potential, which puts it above some other garbage out there. But still still represents everything wrong 2000’s animated films. It’s just annoying.

The review is pretty good, even if I touch on what everyone else has said. I have fun mocking the stupid moments and in general it’s a balance and enjoyable review from me. The only thing left to mention is a comment I got:

Yeah good review, but you’re missing out one thing, it’s a movie for children. It’s not intended for adults, and who are you to judge a kid’s movie? Yeah, it may have some innuendos and some jokes only adults would understand, but it’s still a children’s’ movie.You reacting to this in a bad way is like telling kids to not watch Frozen 2 just because you thought the first one was “bad enough” or annoying. Just let kids enjoy it for themselves, don’t ruin their fun. “

The most shocking part is that this is my first and so far only “IT’S FOR KIDS” comment and it dropped by last year. Huh. But um…no. It’s well known that being for kids is no excuse to talk down to them.

But the big reason this arguments fails in this case is …well, some jokes, like this:


“A lot of white fish can’t do it”

I get that “joke” but as an adult I find the contents of the iflm too dumb down and childish for my tastes, and no kid will get that joke either. So who was that joke aimed for? Adults. There are tons of jokes in stuff like this that are clearly targeted at adults.

If you do that, you don’t get the kids excuse because you clearly put something in for adults. A quality kids product with adults reference can still appeal to them so if kids don’t get it, someone will enjoy it.

Of course you can’t be too hard at something when it’s harmless in the end (like most pre school shows) but everything I say still stands. Also, if my review is “good” then why you seem to hate it so much?

But yeah, a mostly enjoyable review for a pretty crappy kids flick.

Shrek the Third

So in the previous review I first announced DCOM Month but canned it at the time. I eventually did it so for once I got to a canceled project. It amusing how that turned out. Anyway, here’s another review for a Dreamworks film I once liked but now don’t.

I think in this case I just looked at it more critically after actul finding out why people don’t like it. I recall watching whule doing that old list so why I didn’t notice the flaws then is weird. But in general, the movie is just meh.

I find it odd that people treat it like it’s awful, as it almost works. It has all the ingredients you need for a good movie, with tons of good ideas, and funny characters. But it’s bogged down by the writing, which doesn’t go through with some of the ideas and just isn’t that funny in some areas.

Not to mention the insulting death scene for Dad. The film is just wasted potential all around. It comes so close to working but it sadly doesn’t. They thankfully made up for it with the solid 4th film and Puss in Boots.

This is another critical review, really going into what works, what doesn’t, and why. I do a good job analze this stuff and giving it a fair chance all the way through. I also have some funny reactions to balance it all out.

And I still own the DVD, because I now have the rest of the films and I like having them all. Although if I lost it I would not mind. Also, it is no longer the worst film I legally own. We’ll get to that later.

Overall, this is another interesting and fair review.

Ramona and Beezus

This is another one that has slipped my memory, but that’s because I just did it because why not. I was looking for with Selena Gomez in due to Spring Breakers coming (which I still haven’t seen) and as I said, I tried Monte Carlo but I wasn’t feeling in it.

So I saw that she was in this and picked it. All things considered, it didn’t out too bad. The film is still a pleasant surprised, as I did get worried once I found out what it was like. It’s nothing that special, but it’s charming and serves as another decent family film that most people will get something out of.

I know nothing about the books and I hear they have a bit more bite, but this is fine on it’s own. It hasn’t stuck with me too much, and it’s another case where I had to read the review again to remember it, but again, I’ve done so much that some things will slip my mind.

The review is filler, but I didn’t do too bad with it. The pleasant surprise aspect gives me something to discuss and I had some chances for jokes. It’s also one of the few times I mention a real experience, and yes the thing I mention did happen. It’s still one of the few interesting things to happen to me.

The review is on the average side, but eh it was kind of fun to go into something blind and get something surprisingly decent out of it. Plus, I got to talk about Selena Gomez, which is always great.

Romeo and Juliet Sealed with a Kiss

This is a review I wanted to do for a while and I was glad I got to do it. It’s a good thing I waited since I gained a bit more perspective, and I was able to explain why it’s okay for me to review it.

And honestly, the nature of the film is the only reason I don’t hate it more. A small budget can excuse everything…except the script, most of the time. I’ve seen fan films and projects on an even smaller budget that work because you don’t need a budget to simply write something good.

I mean, they had the money to make some really impressive character animation, so a good script is not too much to act. Hell, production wise, everything is top notch, including the score itself.

I mean, it’s not like the one man was a nobody. He worked on actual films in the industury, so we know he has talent in some way. That is what really bugs me.

The film is just really confused, as it fails as a straight adaptation, and as any kind of parody. It’s too shallow to be serious, and the humor is incredibly annoying and just drops in references for no reason.

And yes, Mercautio is on my list. Being a butchered version of an already existing character puts him low on it, but he’s there. The fact that he dies only to come back makes him even worse.

This was a fun review to do because there’s so much wrong with the script. As such ,the review is pretty good. I have plenty of good jokes, and critiquing the film fairly and explain why it fails. My spiel at the start is good too.

It’s one I like to go back since I do think it’s a better one. Overall, you’re still better off with Gnomeo and Juliet despite it’s flaws.

Hotel Transylvania

This is another filler review I’m not too found of. I just did it for fun and didn’t have a lot to say that I couldn’t in some other format. I tied my best and I did okay, but it made for a dull review because you can tell I wasn’t to inspired with this one.

I brought this up as an example of my weaker work in my review of uh…me, and that is why. With that said, it was fun to do in the least and I had some good moments. It just felt pointless on the ciruting front.

There isn’t much to add regarding the film. Except for my feelings on the 2nd one. I thought it was good. Not quite as good, as the writing does resemble a bunch of TV Episodes strung together, and it’s not just quite as funny, but in general it’s good. It keeps up the fast pace, strong animation and has some sweet moments like the first one.

Plus, Jonathon is more likable and Mavis role as a mother is written surprisingly well. While both films could stand to have better writing, they still work because it at least seems like they are tried. Both at least have some attempts at decent heart, more than a lot of mediocre kid’s fare out there.

The animation style is clearly the artists vision and yes, I do think Sony should stick to this, mostly. The way they do fast paced animation is what separates their films from other studios. The exact way they do it is a bit different from Dreamworks, even if they can do similar tricks like the god awful rap in this movie.

I do think perhaps mixing it up would be nice. Dreamworks does it, so people hwo like both kinds of their films will be happy. I’m just saying another Surfs Up type would be nice.

wwesonysurfsup2-172326

…What.

(THIS IS REAL)

Er, anyway, while they have problems, the folks at Sony animation do good work. While the review was weak, the films are still solid, even if they aren’t exactly amazing.

Ice Age 4

This review was the first where I started having the posters at the start. I actually tried it a few times on Blogger but had trouble doing them due to Blogger sucking, so I dropped them. Eventually I figured I’d try again since I liked how Tooncrap did them.

Not much else to say on that front. So where was I?

we’ll likely be seeing ice age 5 in a few years”

..Oh yeah. I’ll save my words on that come July.

The fact that they made a mediocre Ice Age sequel isn’t the worst, as it would happen eventually. I dislike that they pushed it. As both sequels managed to have inspired moments despite their flaws.

But this is just so very mediocre. The story is poorly written, and ends up being cliché even though some concepts were natural in a way. Everything is just so much weaker than before, with Scrat and the song providing the only bits of real energy.

See, even with Ice Age 3’s flaws, it had so much energy it was hard to dislike it due to the all good things it had. Same goes with Rio 2, which I’ll go further on next time. But instead it’s so dull, that it’s hard to find even ironic enjoyment. It’s just dull. And the pirates and sirens are clear signs this series is out of ideas.

At least they had an excuse for Dinosaurs and did some funny things with them. This film isn’t horrible by any means but it’s still the weakest Blue Sky film by far. Hopefully the new one will be an improvement.

The review is another pretty good. It’s one I put effort into as I had revisited the other films and got more disappointed with this one. You can always tell when I put more effort into the research ,as I go into detail on the other films and what happened to the characters.

As such, I critique stuff pretty well here, and have some fun moments. I do have a of pictures though, because I did try to spice things up visually. But not I barely do pictures, although I have done so as recently as Pluto Nash.

Overall, a pretty well done review.

Grown Ups

The movie was terrible, but your bitchy ramblings are absolutely pathetic. Way to nitpick the entire film from beginning to end. Damn you suck”-A very kind commenter.

I'[ll be skipping Grown Ups 2 in the next one, because I’ll cover it hear. Both films are the same, so why waste space doing them separately?

Looking back, it’s weird to see how angry I was here. Was I actually that angry? Mostly. From what I recall, I was pretty angry at it, mostly because I had to sit through it twice. I wasn’t reviewing when I first watched it because I figured I wouldn’t have much to add from Film Brain’s review, but I eventually decided to do it.

I actually wanted to do for Sandler Month, but it fell through at the time. I’ve gone into the films in general plenty, and what more is there to say? They represent everything wrong with Sandler’s work and have barely any effort put into them.

It’s one thing to have a light plot but it’s another thing to just make it full of incredibly lazy and cruel comedy that is somehow not funny despite following a bunch of talented comedians, and Rob Schneider,.

Plus, they still somehow have too much plot with otns of things that just go nowhere. That first did piss me off the time, but I did calm down when it came to the 2nd one. It didn’t’ quite piss me off as much, even if it technically worse.

Speaking of Rob, he seems to finally be back as of The Ridiculous Six. Good for him. Also, seemed to be getting phased out due to being missing in Blended, and not even being credited for his cameo in Pixels (I guess the role of character I want to punch was taken by Josh Gad), but he came back in Six too. Yay?

On a related note, I finally watched Pixels and it was every bit as “Meh’ as I expected. Not very good due to lame comedy, old tropes, and a poorly written (even by Sandler standards) but mixed things up in some aspects and had at least had good action scenes. Yep, not actually awfully like all those hyperbolic assholes claimed. I’m so shocked.

Back on topic, the reviews are pretty good. For Comedy reviews, I had plenty of fun bashing every dumb bit and had some variety in my reactions. I was worried they would be hard to review, but they were easy and fun.

My anger is a bit awkward to read, but that’s because I, in general, am so much calmer it’s gonna be weird to me. The only weird thing is…well, JewWario died when I was doing the 2nd one, so I had to add a little dedication.

A bit awkward after so much anger…but ah well. Also, the 2nd review is currently my most viewed play by play review. …Dang.

So yeah, another set of good reviews.

Hop

Ah yes, the Easter Special. This is another one of those films I’ve just forgotten about. In the grand scheme of things, it has left no impact on me. The fact that it’s an Easter film is the only memorable thing.

It’s still bad, but not in a very unique way. Even at it’s worst, I’ve now seen way worse. Btu it’s still a very weak children’s film being very lazy, cliché and just dull and stupid. It’s just very generic and forgettable.

As such, this is not my most memorable review, but it had still had plenty to make fun of. I had my fair share of good moments. It’s a good one to come back, since I do often forget the film itself.’

Yeah, not too much to say about this one. I hope Illumtion steps away from creatueres that invade bad facebook memes and make something orginaly and interesting. Secret Life of Pets could go either way but I have high hopes for Sing.

But for now, you can see why Despicable Me is the only thing from them anyone cares about. Also, this film came out on April 1st. Really. Speaking of which…

The Oogieloves in the BIG Balloon Adventure

 

This is another one we can skip, as I went into this on the list. I even had my guest reviewer come in, so here’s a repeat of his segment:

Around March of this year, Spongey happened to post a FAQ with some various questions regarding reviews he may or may not do. One of these was about The Oogieloves, which by that time had already become a cinematic punchline. I had wanted to see if the film was really what everyone said it was in their reviews, and since April Fools Day was coming up, I figured it was a legitimate excuse to ask Spongey if I could do a review of it as an April Fools post. If nothing else, at least I’d get what would hopefully be an amusing review out of seeing it. Thankfully, he said yes.

I think I had to watch the movie two or three times to figure out what I wanted to discuss or joke about. It was definitely an interesting experience, as most reviews of this film certainly point out. After I submitted the review, Spongey asked me if I’d be willing to draw a title card for it. I did (with some input from him), and after that he made me an infrequent guest title card artist. I’m not exactly the greatest of artists, so I’ve only done two or three other title cards this year, but I like the way they came out for what little talent I have. Maybe next year, I’ll actually be less lazy when it comes to drawing them and stop using “I can’t draw human beings” or “I misplaced my art materials” as excuses (although I doubt it)”

That last part is amusing now, since now Goldy is back on title cards full time. Anyway, here’s some of what I added there:

I watched it. It sucked.

However, I don’t think it’s the worst film of 2012, or even worth MY person late. It’s pretty bad, but eh, I’d say A Thousand Words was worse. Why? Unlike that film, this one made me laugh. …unintentionally, but still.

I think it it has it’s elements that could make it fun to riff with some buddies, but alone, it’s crap. This is mostly helped by Cary Elwes and Christoper Lloyd..But anyway, this review turned out well, and I thought Ryan did great.”

I stand by all that, once again. It’s my favorite of the “Guest” reviews, thanks to the solid jokes and analysis. Let’s move on.

 

GI Joe The Rise of Cobra

Now we start Toon’d Out Month 2! I think it turned even better than the first one, as I had a better vareity and had plenty of fun with the film selections. We start with a fun one. With the sequel coming out at the time, I figure I’d do this one.

And I still enjoy it. It’s pretty dumb but I find it fun for that reason. And even objectively they mostly put some level of effort into it, and didn’t distract us with tons of crappy comedy like Transformers.

Which is impressive given Marlon Wayons is in it.

While I’m not 100 percent sure how it is an adaptation, on it’s own it’s acceptable dumb popcorn entertainment, with some genuinely good elements here and there. As for the sequel, I have no plans on doing it, but I think it’s about as good.

It’s technically better, but the first one is dumber, and thus more enjoyable for someone like me. But yeah, it is certainly better for the most part. Although I can see why we haven’t had a 3rd one yet.

The review was fun to do, as the film was just dumb enough to mock but just fun enough for it to be enjoyable to riff on. I had some good jokes here and plenty of things to comment on. I may have been too nice to it in some areas, but I mostly stick but what I said.

But hey, it’s good that started things on a positive note, before heading right into trash.

The Smurfs

This film is pretty much basic bad live action adaption. It isn’t the worst, but it’s so typical with everything you expect. Pointless celebrates, lazy writing, dumb jokes, references, and pointless and bland human characters. It’s so generic it hurts, yet it slightly saved by some redeeming elements.

As I said, the voice acting is (mostly) good, Hank Azaria is a good Gargamel, and there are some amusing bits here and there. So I’d call it just normal bad instead of terrible like a lot of others, but it’s still bad.

Also, I think Tom Kane’s role as the narrator here might be a reference to his role as The Narrator in Star Wars The Clone Wars. If it is, I’m going to cut someone.

This is a pretty easy film to do a review for, so I had fine with it. I give credits where it’s due and has some good moments making fun of the problems and dumb moments. I think it was pretty fair in this one, for the most part.

I had seen it a bit before I did the review, so I already knew it was bad and what I would mostly comment on. Most of the time, those kind come out the best, as this one proves. It’s a nice negative review, to get us ready for the real garbage from this month.

Bratz

Oh yeah, this one had to get left off that list, so it’s time to dig in. This is a film I figured would just be bad due to dumb tween stuff, but it turned out to be way worse than I expected. The script is bad, even by the standards of these kind of movies.

As I say in the review, it feels like three episodes of a bad sitcom stitched together. To make it even worse, nothing makes any sense and there are bad morals and stereotypes as the cherry on top.

Given the source materiel, you should expect this to be a bit shallow, but despite trying to be “Sweet” in parts, it keeps the negative qualities of the dolls. I could forgive that if the film was any good but…nope.

Even the lamest of Disney Channel content cares about telling a coherent story where things make sense. This film is really badly written and constructed, all the way through. Usually this kind of thing can be a guilty pleasure, but it’s not even really dumb enough to be enjoyable.

Except for Chelsea Kane as the Alpha Bitch, she almost saves it but even she falls prey to the bad writing.

It’s basically all the pandering teen shit you’d get in a Disney Sitcom, without any of the charm that Disney would give us. This is all the worst aspects of that stuff, with even worst writing and acting.

It’s….bad, to say the least. The review has been a favorite, because is such much wrong, in both the grand scheme and in the small moments. It means there’s plenty comment on and joke about, leading to a pretty balance and solid review.

Oh, and I may consider doing something else Bratz releated. I figured I got my fill here…but I found there exists Bratz Babyz.

What.

Scooby Doo 2

I can sum this up quickly. The film is about equal to the first one, mostly being better by adapting the source materiel, but suffering from enough flaws that it’s still the same quality. I don’t remember this one too much so that’s all the extra insight I can give.

 

The review is good because the film is another one that’s just dumb enough to give me stuff to comment on, even when it’s good. It’s a nice mix and I do more decent critiquing here. My Scooby reviews aren’t the most memorable overall but they have some fun moments.

There, shortest section ever.

Cyberbully

Oh boy, another interesting one. I went into this one in the list, and I actually have stuff to add in a way. Here’s the gist:

This review ended up being one of my most serious, but it’s still funny. Also ,during this section I will explaining a few things I think I didn’t make clear in the review.

In this review, I really went down on the characters and all that, and I got pretty angry. For the most part, I was actually angry. I’ve gotten angry at movies before, but I flat out hated parts of this thing morally.

And I had a message at the end about Internet usage and all that. This arguably one of the few straight up Drama’s I’ve done that tackles an actual issue, so the review itself became a bit more serious.

Thankfully, I didn’t let that in the way of actual reviewing. I just felt that the story went all over the place, the morals were botched, and the characters were fla out unlikable.”

In that list, I clarified what I meant with my criticisms. I went into great detail so you really should go there for me, but there may be even more to say. Even since that list, Cyberbully has become a bit bigger of an issue and some of my comments are getting a bit more awkward.

As I said before, I was just mocking the writing itself and how everything was too contrived for me to buy anything that happened. As I said before:

But in this movie, there are way too many complex events leading up to her attempted suicide that could have been prevented. On a pure narrative level, it doesn’t work. Not to mention that too many moments happen that make Taylor unlikable.”

Nothing in this thing is really handled too well. It’s almost So Bad It’s Good, but the subject matter it to botched to fully become that. And oh god, I am still pissed about the major change they made with the real story.

But yeah, the movie is still bad, and the review is mostly good with how I commented on these elements. And I still love my whole JD running gag. I’m so glad I finally brought it back recently.

That’s all I got on this one, moving on.

Dragonball Evolution

There isn’t a lot to say here. This is a movie that is worse when you see, then when you think about on it. It just blends in with all the other crappy live action adaptions out there. It’s just damn generic, and feels almost nothing like the source materiel.

I suppose there are a few cool moments, and Roshi is captured okay, but everything else is just bad from the effects, to the acting and story. But it’s generically bad you forget about it once you are done ranting.

But it still has plenty of problems, which I do done a fine job of mocking. Again, slightly harsh in some spots but I otherwise did a good job on this one. It is weird how angry I got over the Roshi being revivived thing, given how often I’ve bumped into it since then.

I hadn’t bumped into a cop out like that at that point, so that’s why I got angry. And in this kind of movie, a cop out like that is just inexcusable.

But yeah, once again this is all I got. Can you tell I’m trying to rush through some of these?

The Last Airbender

Oh boy, this one. I’m still not sure if I should have done this or not. Forgetting the crappy blogger review, it’s been done so much that I would have nothing to add to it. And in the end, I still did not add much to it.

But on the other hand, it makes sense to tackle the big one, instead of just ignoring it. It’s one of those rite of passage things. I’m not sure, but it made for a fitting way to end the month.

My feelings are roughly the same. While I don’t hate it as much anymore, it’s still up there as far as bad adaptations go. To be fair, it would be hard to squeeze a season into a film, but they could have tried a lot harder with some aspects.

But you already know that. I do kind of feel bad for M Night, but I’m glad that people seemed to enjoy The Visit okay.

As for the review, it adds nothing but you can tell I tried. I was very familiar with the source, so I had a bit more passion going into this one, and had some good moments. I at least wasn’t half assing it.

But yeah, this was mostly pointless, I just did it to do it. But hey, this isn’t my worst work, so that’s gotta be worth something. Despite how pointless the review was, this film made for a fitting end to the month.

Paranormal Activity 3

And now we begin what I call the Demon trilogy. This was on the strange side, but I’ll get to that with the next review. I knew I would do a found footage parody, and the rest just kind of escalated from there.

It was fun to do that. Now like I say in the review, I did watch this beforehand for reasons I explain which did help it. Although I failed to do that for the other two, and didn’t have too many issues. I kind forgot about what I said by that point though.

While I do see why some people don’t care for it, I still this one is the best in the series. I guess I just like that it goes all out in some places. I do think it is genuinely creepy and well done for the most, and it’s not just the fun factor.

I’m not sure what happened to make this one better, but they do a good job for the most part. I will admit it can be pretty stupid, which is why some people aren’t the biggest fans. I totally get it, I just happen to like it.

As for the review, it’s a good positive review as I do make fun of the dumb moments while also praising it. This movie was fun to do since I had to compare it to the others to explain why I like.

And while it’s good, it is still flawed so it was fun to look at those flaws. It’s another case of a good balance. It was just another fun review to do, especially with the found footage element.

Spy Kids 3D

Now we can talk about the rest of this demon stuff. I originally wanted it to end with the PA 3 stuff, but I thought maybe it would be fun to explain exactly what happened to me. Then I somehow got the idea for the demon to go after me and do all this stuff.

I have no idea where the idea came from I thought it good at the time. I was originally going to just make it two parts, with this one having the journal entry. But for whatever reason, I wanted to do Spy Kids 3 first and ended up making it a pointless trilogy.

In hindsight, I maybe should have not have done this one. It had been done before, and I didn’t have too much of a point ot doing it, while I did really want to do Spy Kids 4. But ah well, it still happened.

Spy Kids 3 is bad, but not really awfully. It’s biggest crime is barely feeling like a Spy Kids movie, and making all the wrong choices. It barely has any spy stuff, and the focus is on the weakest sibling with very little interaction between the two.

It’s just lame and stupid. It’s not terrible that a mediocre Spy Kids film exists, but they still made some dumb decisions like splitting up the titular kids for no real reason. The whole plot line of Juni leaving doesn’t even really lead to anything, he just comes back because they say so!

The review is fine, given I didn’t even need to do it. I had some good moments, and said a few things I don’t think had been brought up, like just how rushed and crappy the ending is. But yeah, like all trilogies, part 2 was just pointless, but fine.

Spy Kids 4

Now for the end of the trilogy. This is a movie I had wanting to do since I started, so it was great to finally do it. While I will still give it credit for trying to be more like the original films, it can’t make up for the rest of the film.

I suppose it tries to have some interesting themes of not wasting time, but it’s pretty hamfisted and I don’t care about any of these characters. They use so many cliches, and the humor is very much bottom of the barell.

Like I said, even part 3 managed to avoid poo poo jokes, but this one was nothing but those. And time puns. I hate the time puns.

The whole this is just stupid. I hadn’t seen the others when I watched this one, so it was interesting coming back to it after seeing the others. Yeah, it’s easily the worst, and I hope this franchise is finally dead for good.

The review is good. I could explained myself more in a few areas, but otherwise I like it. There’s some good moments with my reactions and of course the time pun counter. It’s another one I like to come back to, even with the odd “story line”.

This was the only time I tried do anything like this on here, because something like this makes no sense on a blog. It was just something fun to do, and I think it mostly works. And I got some good reviews out of it!

Oh, and in universe the demon is fine with me covering any future PA films and won’t bug me again. Although for old time sake it wouldn’t be bad to bring him back when ido the new one…but we’ll see.

Recess School’s Out

I was finishing my current school year at the time, and I wanted a good film after the demon stuff, and this came to mind. It did the trick. I don’t recall if I had plans to do this one prior, but I thought it would be a bit of fun to do.

I’m not sure if I’d call it the best Show to Movie Translation, but it is still good. Yeah, it gets a bit too big but it mostly captures the basic essence of the show while going deeper into certain things.

It has a solid story to it with good development for some characters, and is pretty heartwarming in spots. I think it’s a bit underrated compared to other films of it’s kind. The review can be a bit on the boring side sometimes, but it thinks get better once I get into exactly why I the film works.

I do a good job explaining some elements, while having a few good jokes here and there. There isn’t a lot make fun in this film for the most part, so it’s not exactly my best, but I did well enough here.

It’s not my best positive review, but I do think it’s a decent one, since you can tell I was somewhat passionate at least. So yeah, this one is good.

Sucker Punch

Oh, this one was interesting. It’s one of the few films a couple people expressed in me doing, and I thought of reviewing it anyway, so here we are. It is interesting how divisive this thing was back when it came out, with it’s reputation going down a lot since them.

In a way, I see both sides and think the bigger detractors are a bit on the harsh side. I can see what they were trying to do, and it’s really interesting. But like I said, they barely explain anything and make it too confusing.

It’s clear that this is the only Zack Synder film he has a writing credit on, to my knowledge. He is a great visual director, but he can’t handle a more complex story without making it messy, at least from what I have seen.

They were clearing trying this more complex story, but it sadly came out as a mess, script wise. The review is another favorite, as the film provides me with plenty to work with. I had some good critiques as well as some good reactions.’

It’s also a long one. Most of reviews back then were longer since I commented on small moments a bit more. I guess I got less long winded as time went on. Overall, this is another pretty solid review with good critiquing.

30 Nights of Paranormal Activity with The Devil Inside The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo

Yay, another interesting. I skipped this one in my list because I felt I said everything I could say, when I talked about 41 Year Old Virgin in that worst list. And yeah, there’s not much to add to the film itself.

I will say this film was a lot messier than the other one. This movie just makes no sense and basically just kind of tires out by the end. Even 41 Year Old Virgin had more of a coherent story, despite pissing me off more.

But I’ve said my piece on why spoof movies like this are terrible. I’ve used so much more though on 41 Year Old Virgin that I barely care about this one. It’s equally as terrible, just not as everything.

It is interesting how I skimped out on the final thoughts, in favor of a lame joke rehashing a blogger post I regret. The actual review is good, mostly due to my reactions. There was plenty of dumb stuff to comment on, and I think I did a good job explaining some of the problems. It’s a fun review, I think.

Ted

I hear a sequel is in the works, and hey. I’d see it. Why? Well, remember how I asked why no one else wished for their own ted? Yeah, use your imagination.”-Me, 2013

Well, the intro this review is a bit awkward, given how my opinions on changed old Seth-y boy. But I do stand by the general message, and to be fair, I didn’t see the very worst he had to offer at that point.

But back to the film/review itself. Some positives happen because I genuinely want to spotlight the film and explain I like it, or go a bit deeper. It happened with Wimpy Kid and AT2D and ith append here.

Going into the film, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I figured it could go either way. Most of all, I expected a weak story and decent jokes. But instead I got, decent jokes but also a surprisingly solid story.

Which is really odd since it is pretty cliché, and Seth is not known for good drama. But I noticed in his hsow, the drama works best when it’s character driven. Just look at Brian’s Play. So it mostly works here.

It does work fine as a comedy but as a drama it’s surprisingly good because the writers put effort into making this situation believable. The Comedy does help to, as these characters are likable enough to carry the story, for the most part.

There are some clunkers, which in hindsight I should have highlighted, and a lot of bits go on t long, but otherwise it’s quite the solid cinematic debut for Seth. The review is a favorite, because I think I did a good job explaining why the film is better than even it’s fans give it credit for.

I explain in detail why the story works and have my share of good moments, like my reactions to some odder bits. It’s another really good balance that I strike here.

And of course, like with HT, he should talk about the sequel. In general…it was okay. The main plot with Ted fighting to be considered a person was pretty interesting, and kind of went into sort of deep things for this kind of movie.

For the most part, it was enjoyable enough and had the same basic charm. But it has one big problem that kind of sunk it: Mila Kunis’ character is gone. And in universe they got a divorce, apparently because she was trying to control him and make him what he wasn’t.

  1. don’t like this. It’s bad enough when sequels sometimes ditch the love interest for no reason, but for this pretty much ruins the point of the first movie and why I liked it to begin with!

    I guess they couldn’t get her back for this one but you can find a way around that that doesn’t insult the people who really cared about their relationship before. Their excuse doesn’t even make sense, as she pretty much learned not to do that stuff at the end AND Marky Mark learned to not screw up his life so much.

Here, he’s back where he started but it’s okay because he’s with Ted more often and has a new love iterest who happens to be into doing stuff they do. How amazing and convivnent is that!

 

I’m not sure that having the character would make the movie automatically good, but it would have made it better and given John more to do since in the film he’s not as funny as before.

So…yeah, /I’m not happy with that, but otherwise, Ted 2 is fine. I don’t regret watching it, I just wish it was a bit better. Oh, and a plotline involves Hasbro which means..-

5555

.Moving on!

(Ted 2 is property of Universal)

Halloweentown

And now we begin DCOM Month. Oh boy. This is something the idea for, and I’m so glad I got to do it. I knew about DCOM’s before, but doing this made me do further research and gain a deeper knowledge. 2013 is when I fully got more into the Disney Channel Crap and started focusing on it on the blog a lot more..

I see that as a good thing, by the way.

I think this is my best theme month, as I had a nice variety, and got to do mostly good films. And we start on a good note. As a franchise, Halloweentown was more consistent than I expected, and this film starts it well.

There’s a great charm to it, with plenty of creativity in spite of some wonky pacing. Yeah, no brings up how weak the pacing can be sometimes, especially when compared to the sequel. But it’s still solid.

The review is good. There isn’t a lot to say, really. I do a fine job mocking it while also explaining it why it works. Nothing too amazing in that regard, but this was fun. It’s the kind of good movie that is fun to do.

It was weird to do more Halloween in July, but fun. I actually plan to do something Halloween related this July, so look forward to that. But yeah, this is a good start to the month.

Camp Rock

Now for my least favorite DCOM, at the moment. That will likely change if I ever manage to watch more. This one still kind of falls under guilty pleasure, but it’s still on the weak side. I think the main reason is that it’s not as fun as some others.

It’s kind of dull and likes the energy the others tend to have. Which means it’s flaws aren’t as fun as some other DCOM’s. It makes the writing issues even worse. With that said, there are things to enjoy, like the Alpha Bitch, so it’s still very much bearable for me.

So I can mostly join in the choir on this one, but I still can’t say I’ve found a “bad” DCOM. Wil li find out I genuinely can’t stand? The world may never know!

The film’s flaws lead to a pretty good review. Plenty of good critique, along with some funny moments. It’s another easy target, after all. My comment about Demi is hilarious in hindsight, since she has kind of come back and become relevant again. Funny how that turns out.

So yeah, a fairly flawed DCOM makes another good entry in this month. At least I got the worst out of the way quickly.

Minutemen

Now for Disney Channel’s take on Time Travel that was not mocked for some reason!

Fro this month, I had a list of DCOM’s I was curious about and let Random.org pick a few for me to review. This came up so I did it. I remembered it existing, but that’s about it. And after reviewing, it I find it decently underrated.

It’s not one of my favorites, but it works. The time travel is used well, as it has it’s own rules and stays small in scale so things don’t get too confusing, but they still have fun with it. That’s a hard balance to get. A fairly decent story with sweet moments help make this a solid one. It’s not the most memorable but it’s fine.

The review reflect this. It’s on the boring side since there isn’t a lot to make fun on, but as usual by this point, I get in some good points. It’s sometimes hard to do a “Decent” film like this, but I had fun with. Not the most memorable entry in this month, but still good.

Smart House

I talked about the film recently, so I can just skip to the review. I will add that some elements are kind of creepy when you think about it, but if you look past those bits, the film is pretty great.

This is another good positive review. Sometimes it is fun to praise something, and I had here. Mostly due to the Horror element, which gave me something to mock. Seriously, this could be recut into a horror film and not look too different.

It’s a nice balance of jokes and praising. And in general I just liked spotlighting this one, as I do think it’s slightly underrated. I think people like it, but I don’t think it quite gets the praise it deserves. I’m not sure I changed anyone’s mind….but one commenter wants to see it now, so that’s good.

It’s another review I like coming back, for those reasons. It is weird that I haven’t’ brought back the RATED G gag. I don’t do a lot of G films but I could up it to PG. Whatever.

Overall, a great film makes for a really good review.

Space Chimps 2

I took a minor break to punish myself. I don’t recall why I did this one, but I ended up watching the first one and wanted to see how the sequel fared. Yeah, it’s still pretty bad. Mostly because of how empty is.

The first film was mediocre, but was kind of bearable and not too anger inducing. This one is…just nothing. Barely anything happens, and I don’t even remember much of it. That’s because nothing happens to be remembered at all!

Even by Direct to Video standards, this film is pathetic. It’s not on my bottom 10 but it’s still incredibly boring and lazy. Even worse films give me more to chew on than this film did. It’s just….empty.

The review is as good as you’ll get with this movie. It gave me enough to work with, I suppose. I have plenty of fun riffing on how dumb and empty it is. It’s not my best work, but it mostly works pretty well.

Now, when it comes to sequels to Vanguard films, I can say that Happily Never After 2 is better. And it still kind of sucks. I watched both of the Happily Never After films to maybe review them, and I’m still not sure if I will.

Happily Never After is bad, but it’s bad because it’s BORING. Like, one of the most boring and stale animated features ever. It’s not even really painful in the same way as Hoodwinked 2. Meaning I’m not sure what I could say.

I was hoping for the sequel to be worse, but it was about the same and honestly the orginal pissed me off more. The only thing really worse is the animation, which might be worse than in this movie. Yikes.

I just said that to vent a bit on those films. Hopefully Valiant is better, but somehow I doubt it.

Let it Shine

Before I start, I should mention that I have seen that 4 or so person Channel Awesome review of it. You can imagine to seeing it on there thinking the film was not remembered. The review was good….but I was incredibly disappointed that no one mention Girl you Pterodactyl fly.

I mean, how did 4 people watch the film at least twice to review it, and somehow NOT notice the best lyric ever and commented on it? Ugh. To be fair, one guy from the review did RT a Tweet from Cartoon Hero referencing the line so….one guy knows of it now.

Speaking of the line, let’s talk about how it’s the only reason I did the review. Yeah. When it came out, I had no interest in it and usually I wouldn’t review it all since no one cared about it. But somehow, someone I know on Twitter came across the song with that line and shared it.

I was mesmerized by it and was referencing it for a bit. Eventually I watched the actual film and knew I had to do it for this month, if only to share the line. If it the line wasn’t there, I would not review the film because I wouldn’t have bothered to watch it at all, at this point.

It was for the best since it turned out fine. There isn’t much to add to the film. I admit it’s on the weaker side of the DCOM Scale, due to the plot problems but it does at least try to go into more interesting themes than usual. So it’s not a total failure, and it plenty of guilty pleasure elements. And the acting is actually pretty good for the most part.

The review is another favorite, if only for one of my favorite rants. The rest is good too as the film gave me plenty to work with. It’s another one I like going back to because I have my share of funny parts.

It is interesting how the one of the more forgotten recent DCOM’s, lead to the most memorable review. …But seriously, even after all this time, I still don’t get it.

Halloweentown Sequels

I figured I’d put them all here to avoid repeating myself when it comes to them. I could have waited til another time to do the sequel but eh, why not do something good to fash out the taste of Let It Shine.

I still think the sequels are surprisingly consistent. Some are better than others, but each is decent in it’s own way and adds more to the world. Yes, one plot line is repeated but otherwise, each is different. 2 brings the main villain back, 3 gives Marnie a project and goes a bit deeper on some things, and 4 went more into the history, and actually had Halloweentown in it.

Each film did something new that I appreciated. I still think Part 2 is the best, as iKt has all the strengths of the series without the weakness. Not too many dumb plot holes, and no weak villain, and tighter pacing.

But I do like the others fine for what they bring. I still stand by review of Part 4, people only bitch about it for the actor change. Kimberly J Brown isn’t upset about it, so why should you? If you actually look at them, each film has about as many issues as this one, and this one has plenty of strengths.

So while 2 is the best, the others sequels are decent too. All of the reviews are good for the same reasons I’ve been repeating. Each gave me something to comment for both jokes and review. Maybe not a ton of materiel, but enough.

Return to Halloweentown is my favorite of the reviews, if only because of my big defense rant. I used some of my best critiquing here as well as good jokes. It made for a good way to close my Halloween 2013 reviews.

Overall, a solid series of sequels with some solid reviews.

You Wish!

There isn’t too much to add to this one. I remembered this one fairly well from when I was a kid and it thankfully held up. It still amazes me that they fixed the main problem with this kind of story by having them bond before fighting and causing the plot.

Aside from that, it’s a solid film with sweet moments. Not in my top 10 or anything but a good sweet classic one. The review is okay. There’s way too much explaining and not enough jokes but I have some good moments and critiquing here and there.

It’s a fairly forgettable review, but not a bad one. At least the movie is decently memorable. …That’s all I got.

High School Musical 2 and 3

Once again, it makes more sense to combine them. This is another one I went into in that list and I did it really well. Once again, the gist:

The review itself was fun to do. It’s nothing new in terms of jokes but I had fun looking at critical view vs Personal views when it comes to movies like this. I also loved my Sharpay gushing.

…I did half exaggerate my love for her, for some jokes but it is half real. She is just so over the top that she steals every scene she’s in. I loved praising her so much in these reviews. I personally think Ashley Tisdale is the most talented of the main actors in this series.

I mean being over the top and actually fun is one thing, but just the way she says these lines shows she actually knows what she is doing. When she has actual good things to do (like the scene where she’s broken in the 2nd one) she sells it pretty well.

Which is why she got the biggest change to shine outside of this series of all the stars. …Yeah, I have no idea why she had to go and do Scary movie 5 but eh, we still have Phineas and Ferb.

.But anyway, Shapray is indeed the reason I enjoy these films as much as I do. So awesome. But the rest of each film is fine too but without her, I wouldn’t be as defensive of them as I am.

It was fun to jokingly praise her and make fun of how inconsistent her very character is.

…Back to the movies themselves, I didn’t really plan to do part 3 right away but I had so much fun with 2 that I did anyway, and I’m glad I did. I liked it more this time around and since I haven’t heard the songs in awhile, I was pleasantly surprised by some of them.’

It’s the one I would want to watch the most as 1 & 2 have their issues in terms of re-watch value but 3 doesn’t,. even if it’s flawed.

But anyway, the reviews themselves were clearly passionate even if no one shares that passion. I had fun mocking these movies in the most affectionate way possible.

I’m not sure what else to say. All my thoughts on these films are right in the reviews themselves. I had fun looking at the insane parts, but also showing why I enjoyed them greatly.

Call my crazy all you want, but I still find these movies to fun and these reviews reflect that plenty”.

Yeah, not too much to add in. These reviews were some of the most fun to do, due to all the mockable elements. But my passion made them even more fun than if I didn’t like them. It was a perfect way to end the month, and I’m glad I did the 3rd one too.

Not too much else to say at this point. ..Oh, you wanna me hear my thoughts on the announcement of a proper 4th film? Eh, we’ll see. I’m just hoping for an amazing Alpha Bitch for the new cast, or a Sharpay cameo.

Wishful thinking I know, but whatever. I hope it’s still dumb fun, even with a new cast. We’ll see. The only thing to add is hti part:

Will they do something big for 100? Doubt it. They don’t count the first one, and say Under Wraps was the first. Semi Unofficial ones like 16 wishes ARE counted by their site so I guess 101 will be 100 for them.”

…Whoops.

Dog with a Blog-Stan Stops Talking

i guess I could have discussed it normally after all!”-Me, 2013

This is a rare case I don’t think I should have done the review. At the time, I was planning to do the Disney Sitcom look thing I canned, and thought this episode was a bit too complex to discuss when I talked about the hsow.

I was wrong, as the episode was easy to talk about and made for kind of a dull review. With that said, at least I got to explain why the show was a bit more than it seemed. Although a deeper episode came a bit later that would have been more sense to review due to it’s story, but maybe I can talk that one some other time.

Spoilers, I plan to do a Spongey’s Favorite Episodes for the Disney Sitcoms that were not in that look post I did. There, I’lll get to into it. This is also why I haven’t done a positive Disney Sitcom review since this one. Maybe I’ll do one, we’ll see.

There isn’t much to add to the episode. I appreciate the sort of deeper themes, and there’s some decent humor too. Again, it’s proof the show is less stupid than people may think .The review is pretty boring but I do have some fun explaining why it works…so it’s not a total loss.

But yeah, if I do another positive Disney Sitcom Episode Review, I’ll try to make it more interesting.

Escape From Planet Earth

It doesn’t too often but sometimes I’ll catch a bad film around when it comes out and I will counting the days to it’s DVD release so I can tear it apart. This is an earlier case of that. On an unrelated note, Norm of the North review coming May 4th.

I will admit I hated it slightly less on a repeat viewing, but it’s still really bad. It’s another pandering kids film with incredibly lame jokes, and a cliché and crappy story. The first animated film of each year since 2013 has been the worst, except The Nut Job, but that was still not very good.

Although, Walking with Dinosaurs does this one a run for it’s money.

But yeah, it’s a bad one. The review is another good one. Once again, I think I did well think mocking it’s various flaws and all that. It’s a classic good negative review in my book. Not my most notable since I wasn’t hugely angry, but that’s why it’s a good balance.

The film gave me just enough to work with, as it’s stale but at least hangs enough happening to commenting on. So yeah, it’s a fine one.

Movie 43

Yay, I get to talk about this…thing again. It’s fun to look back on this one, as it was the angriest I had gotten in a while. And it still makes me angry, even after all this time. I have officially been desensitized to shock humor, but sometimes it still pisses me off, like the two segments in this I hated the most.

Speaking of, I am all for shock humor if it’s done right. But only those two segments are really shocking, the rest are just incredibly lazy. Oh hey, Hugh Jackman has a ballsack on his chin. Hilarious.

It’s just incredibly one note and boring for most of it. And when it’s shocking, it’s only for the sake of it and is more anger inducing than funny. I still fail to see the humor in…what happened in that cat sketch.

It’s still up there as one of the worst films I’ve reviewed. It’s just lazy and insulting. The interesting thing about the review, is that I did it twice. I didn’t have the US version at the time but eventually I found the one with the other wraparound.

Instead of waiting for another chance to do it, I decided to post the review again, only I cover the other wraparound this time. I think that was an okay idea, as I had enough to say about that one.

That, and I got to make a joke about Seth’s involvement. Yeah, at least now I can say Modern Family guy isn’t the worst he’s had his name on.

The review itself is fine. It goes get dull due ot the film getting dull, but I have some good moments with my anger. Sometimes my anger can be funny, like right here. It’s not my greatest work, but it was fun to do, and it was so satisfying to bash it.

But yeah, still, screw this movie.

Air Buddies (series)

And now it’s time for one of my bigger accomplishments of the year, reviewing all of the buddies films. I could have just done one of them, but for whatever reason, I wanted to do them all throughout the year.

It’s amazing that I survived.

I kind of went into this in the list, but didn’t say too much. I did explain the idea for Goldy coming in, so you can go there for that.

As for the movies, they are still pretty bad. I wouldn’t say any is on bottom 10, but they are examples of pandering kids entertainment with barely any thought put into them. Most of them are just a bunch of dumb jokes with incredibly cliché plots thrown in, with stereotypical characters.

Some of them are mostly harmless, like Snow Buddies and Spooky Buddies, but crap like Santa Buddies is just pure crap. The biggest compliment I can give this series compared to other kids films, is that…the plots tend to make some kind of sense and at least they only go to direct to video.

But they are still mostly bad. I said it before and I’ll say it again: Air, Space and Santa are tied for the worst. Air is particularity tiring and dull, Space has an incredibly thin story, and Santa is the most cliché christmas film ever made.

The least bad was Spooky Buddies, since it has some enjoyable element, and mostly kept the buddies out of it. It still wasn’t very good, but it was just…meh. Which is an imprvoment.

I’d go each one, but there isn’t much to add beyond what I said. Mostly since I barely remember much of the ones I haven’t mentioned. As for the reviews, some are better than others. The Snow Buddies review is the weakest since there was less to discuss, but the rest are mostly good due to the materiel.

The Santa Buddies review is my favorite, as it had the most bullshit to make fun of. But the rest did have their moments.

It is interesting how I did this due to the new one, and said I’d do each new film that comes out…and there hasn’t been one since then. Guess they spared me. As you recall, I did the directors next film to make up for it.

And he actually already came out with a new one back in January! I won’t review it, but I will likely watch it since it’s on Netflix. It’s about a Monkey, because I guess even he got sick of dogs.

Oh, and I have to correct something: I said Santa Buddies had the Debby Ryan song on it’s Dvd, but I was wrong. That was The Search for Santa Paws. Whoops. At least she’s on a…slightly less bad one.

There is one thing left to say for this one: Over the years, I’ve collected a variety of Disney DVDs and that Disney Rewards Code has always been there in most of them, but I never bothered to look into it.

But recently,. I finally bit the bullet and signed up for that stuff and get a bunch of points thanks to all the codes I happened to have. I actually had enough to get something, but the best thing in my “price” range was a “Mystery DVD”.

Becausse I’m such a rebel, I got it, knowing full it might be something I have, or something bad. Which is how a copy of Space Buddies end up in my mail a bit later.

Yes, I now have a copy of Space Buddies sitting in my closet, because there’s’ no way in hell it’s going on my shelf. Here’s proof:

Buddies

I’m not sure if i’ll give it away or not. I think I’ll keep it because of the circumstances in which I got it. That and to remind me to not feel too bad for still owning Shrek the Third.

But yeah, those are the Buddies reviews. It was plenty of fun to tear them apart, even if it was hell getting through them.

Special Agent Oso-Thundersmall

Here’s a rare positive TV review. It’s weird out of of the tree major ones I’ve done, John Loy has writing credits on two of them.

Anyway, I discovered this show when I first got Disney Jr and for whatever reason I decided to give most of their shows a shot. Somehow, Sofia was not one of those at that time, even I’m pretty sure it was on.

Some I watched more of like Handy Manny due to finding them okay, and some I just watched one or two like Jake and the Neverland Pirates, cuz I wasn’t really interesting. But with Oso, I kept watching it because it was just so…dumb!

I explained it in the review, but this one was enjoyable because of how little sense it made, and all that. This lead to me watching the finale, which I knew nothing about going on. Needless to say, I had to share it, so I did.

It still shocks me how good this was. It’s nothing amazing, but it was surprisingly interesting, sweet, and an overall fitting finale that made the rest of the series better. I have no idea how this happened, but I’m glad it did.

This means any other pre school has no excuse to not try, because even this show can be great! I wonder if Mickey Mouse Clubhouse has a good episode..

The review is good. My shock at how good it is, is amusing and I have some good jokes along with some good praise. It’s an inspired positive review, which is hwy it works better than the Stan Stops Talking one.

Not too much else to say. Except…i still don’t know how a Disney show got away with referencing Octopussy in an episode title.

Teen Beach Movie

Now we go to the start of my tradition to cover each new DCOM as it came out. Yeah, due to lack of time I’m not doing that. But luckily, I had enough to say for most of them. For this one, I had share just how interesting this one is.

And I still quite like it. It’s a pretty fun parody of musicals, with a lot going for it. As I said in the review, the best parts are in the movie with how dedicated a lot of these actors are. The songs perfectly homage the style of those kind of films, and we get plenty of funny lines with lampshade hanging.

Yeah, it starts off kind of full but once the plot begins, it never lets up, even when it has to get “emotional”. It’s not perfect but it’s still fun and it’s cool that Disney was willingly to poke a little fun at themselves in a way.

On a side note, I feel the crowd who dislikes this one flat out doesn’t get it. No one critiques as parody, most of them flat out don’t get it. Understand what something is before you bash it. It’s like panning something like, I don’t know, Cinema Sins, as critics and not as comedy, like it actually is.

But back on track. The review is another good positive one. Once again, I do a good job of explaining why it works, while also making some decent jokes when I can. That’s pretty much about it, really. Pretty typical good positive review, really.

 

Ghost of Fear Street Pilot

Here’s a fun one. Like I said in the review, I didn’t even know this was real. I thought it was just a weird rumor, but somehow I found it on YouTube at the time by accident. I knew I had to review so I cooked this up.

Since then, no one else really covered it so I failed in my mission to give it attention. I would love for this to end up on DVD-R Hell Someday. There isn’t too much to add to the pilot.’

It’s enjoyable just for how odd it is. I’m not sure if it would have worked as a full show in this state, but it was certainly…interesting. It kept in the spirit of the books with how crazy it was, but the story was all over the place.

Also, if you watch this not knowing about the books, the title wouldn’t make sense.

I still recommend because it’s so odd and rare. It’s still up, so you may as well still catch it and make Armpit Spider-Man a Household name!

The review is pretty good, since I naturally have some amusing reactions to the craziness. I also do try to make sense of it and properly review, as hard as that is. I did fine on both fronts with this one. It’s a sort of hidden review, although I remember it for how odd the subject is.

As far as Stine TV Stuff goes, I will finally do The Nightmare room in October. Not sure about Eye Candy. Still haven’t seen it, but if I can find it, I’ll see what I can do.

Madagascar 1, 2, and 3

Now for another franchise I ended up doing. Yeah, I didn’t end up saying too much about them, making them pointless reviews, but whatever. Once again ,i am putting all the reviews together to make it easier.

As far as this franchise goes, I still like it. Each film stands on it’s own as surpsingly decent, while the sequels so add more in spite of their flaws. The sequels know what to keep and what to change, and even tell a complete story in the end.

They balance comedy and heart better then I thought they would. It has those cheesy Dreamworks moments but most of it kind of works. I think some of their better “funny” films since it manages to be inspired despite looking kind of generic.

It is interesting how the first one is sort of the weakest, despite some of the flaws of the sequels that should make them on par. I think it’s because they happen to be a bit funnier with less bad moments, with their weaknesses just being small plot things I can forgive.

But I still they are all good. Maybe the 3rd is the funniest with the 2nd having the best plot, but it’s close. The reviews are middling ones. I do fine with explaining why they work, but I don’t have quite as many good moments.

These films just aren’t quite as reviewable given my opinion, but they aren’t the worst reviews. My good points kind of make up for the dull spots. So I’ll call them fine.

As my thoughts on the Penguins movie, I’ll have a chance go into detail some other time if end up doing what I plan to do. In short, it was fine. The weakest in this franchise, but still fine.

Also, because I hate you all: AFRO CIRCUS AFRO CIRCUS!

The Spongebob Squarepants Movie

 

And now for my big 100th review…which I’ve discuss before. I went into this on the list, and even put it as the best film I reviewed in the first two years. I really can’t add to much, which sucks. But I can post the gysyt yet again:

It’s not 100 percent my best work but I love it. I’ve already said that Spongebob pretty much is my childhood and this movie represents it perfectly.

But that’s why I like this review. Not just cuz I gush over a childhood fave….but I don’t let get in the way of the review. I point out many plot holes, personal gripes and even admited it’s not a great film.

I did gush over it and admit my love is personal but I also looked at it on a critic level. I could have easily just pushed that aside and said it’s great. But nope, I looked at it like a real fake critic.

I struck a perfect balance between reviewing and gushing. That’s what makes this one the best. It wasn’t hard to find flaws, but there has always been things that bug me in this movie, as well as plot holes I’ve noticed.

Not only that, but I had some pretty solid jokes for a positive review. Like my subtitle for the KK 2 and all that. Outside of some typos, this review turned out perfectly.’

Yeah, that’s about it. A great milestone review for a special film. Not too much to add here.

Judy Moody and the NOT Bummer Summer

Another review that has been forge ten, because the film has. Can’t blame them, neither the review of film are too memorable. The film is just a pretty typical quirky kids flick that tries too hard.

It’s not horrible but it tries too hard to be quirky, the writing is off in some places, and the acting is hit or miss. I can see where it could have been charming but it just didn’t pan out perfectly. It’s just…mediocre.

The review isn’t too bad. This film does have some special problems, so I got some decent materiel out of it. This is a forgotten review where I do try and have some small good moments. I do good at explaining why it fails and have amusing reactions too.

So yeah, not the most memorable, but it holds up fine.

Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday

Friday the 13th time! There isn’t much to say on this one, as this review doesn’t stick out quite at much in my mind. I barely even remember the film. From what I recall, it’s enjoyable I suppose, but not what I was expecting from the title.

For this franchise, it’s in the middle. Not the best, but not the worst either. Worth watching I suppose, but there are better options. All the reviews tend be of the same quality, as each film has tons to make fun of, even the good moments.

So I have good moments, especially due to the premise. I also critique well here too, since I do try to give credit with these films, even if I just watch them to enjoy them. So yeah, maybe a weaker Friday review, but still another good one.

Hannah Montana:The Movie

Yay, another fun one. This is the most interesting of the movies based on Disney Sitcoms, and just because it ended up in theaters for some reason. When it came out, I was in my “Ugh Disney sux” phase so I didn’t exactly care about it. I do recall the trailer pushing the whole “Will Miley reveal her secret thing?” and wondering if they will go through with it or not. I didn’t’ care enough to look into it, or read any reviews. Then years later I ended up watching Todd in the Shadows’ review and found out about the ending.

I was….more than a little baffled. So when I sat down to watch it, I knew the ending and figured I wouldn’t be too mad compared to him. But then I actually got into the story near the end. I more or less had the experience I went through in the review, being mad at first, then just being indifferent, then getting into it.

Then getting mad at the ending,because know I saw the full context. It still bugs me. The movie is pretty average otherwise, but then the ending ruins it. It’s one thing to have a cop out, but it’s another to do in an insulting way that pretty much makes the movie morally terrible.

If this was an episode, it wold be a fine since they cop out all the time. But this is a movie, where I’m expecting to have a reason to exist. With this ending, the movie is pointless AND has a moral problems! How does that even happen?

And of course it’s worse after the actual pretty much did this better in an episode where she realizes her secret hurts people, and just reveals it, with her life improving from there! So this movie is extra pointless!

It’s…a bad ending. The rest is just meh.

The review is pretty good, having plenty of good moments and tearing down the ending perfectly. It’s another easy movie to tear apart, and I did it pretty well. That’s pretty much it on this one.

Camp Rock 2

Now for the start of a tradition. Yep, the brother birthday reviews. I just thought it woild ben ice to have him a pick a review and I’ve been doing them ever since. I just give him a list of films could review that he had heard of, and he picked them from there.

Thankfully, his first pick was a pleasant surprise. Camp Rock 2 is no master piece, but it’s a surprisingly improved sequel. It’s heavily flawed when it comes to some storylines, but those are typical compared to the boredom of the first film.

It has a real energy to it which makes a lot of it more interesting. This makes the songs better too. But of course, the highlight is the ending. For this kind of movie, it’s pretty mature and ends things on a really nice note.

After Hannah, this was such a good breather. It’s the enjoyable guilty pleasure I was expecting from the first film. It’s easily the better of the two films. The review is the usual good DCOM review, with the ending adding something.

Again, I do fine mocking it while having fun doing so, and explaining why stuff works or fails. It’s another fine review with a good explanation of a good ending.

Billy Madison

Now for the 300th post special! And…i had it on the list, where I explained it perfectly. So let’s roll the text version of a clip show:

My goal with this review was really go into why this film works, and today’s Sandler films don’t. For a mostly simple comedy, I went more in depth then even it’s hardcore kids.

And I wasn’t stretching here. I did have a lot of these feelings about the character growth and all that. If you can’t tell by now, I love analyzing Sandler’s works cuz I find them so fascinating in what is good and bad about them.

It’s interesting to see what is the same and what is different about each film he does. That’s part of why I like doing these Sandler reviews. This has become one of my faves though, cuz of much I thought it out.

The movie itself is alright. It improved on the 2nd viewing, cuz some of the lamer jokes didn’t have much of an impact the 2nd time around. I do think maybe the B- was a tad harsh but given the weak elements, I won’t take it back.

I also like that I was able to view it on a critical level, without bashing it, like so many other real critics have done. A lot of people who grew up with it simply enjoy it cuz it’s funny. That is part of it, but I was able to show that it has hints at character stuff, that it should have used more.

When it comes to early Sandler, I prefer Happy Gilmore and Wedding Singer, but this was his first real movie, so I’ll cut him some slack.

Also, when I re-read this review for this post, I laughed at some of my jokes. I RARELY do that, at least in my comedy reviews. My personal fave joke in the Bus/Driver penguin otp line”

Yeah, not too much to add to that. A surprisingly in depth comedy review, which made for a pretty great milestone.

Scooby Doo: The Mystery Begins

So begins our Halloween 2013 reviews! We begin with one that does not leave me with much to say. Once again, I barely even remember it. It’s fine, I guess. It’s another movie that does nothing horribly wrong, or amazingly right.

At least , I don’t remember anything that makes it terrible or great, it’s just average. It checks all the boxes, and I suppose is more even than the theatrical films, but it is less memorable to me. I seriously didnt’ remember anything from this until I read the review again.

Said review is fine. I said plenty to make it good, with amusing reactions and good analsis. I had more to say at the time then now, as you can tell. Will I do the sequel thing to this film? Maybe, but it will be next year or so.

So…yeah, fine start to Halloween, just not the most memorable film.

Mostly Ghostly

You may recall that I tried doing this review n July of 2012, but it somehow got lost and I had to til October of 2013 to cover it. That at least meant I knew what I would say for the first 20 or so minutes, making it slightly easier. I had seen the film even before then so I pretty much knew what to say on this one.

And yeah, it’s still enjoyable. Not exactly the best written film but a lot of fun due to the comedy and most of the actors, especially Brian Steppanek. And the plot is passable enough for it to be objectively good.

But it is my own personal enjoyment that makes it good, so it’s not the highest recommendation compared to some Stine films. Honestly, When Good Ghouls Go Bad is the only I’d totally suggest since most people will like it, but more on that in the 2014 one.

Oh, and they actually announced a third one not too long ago. I will review it when it comes out, don’t worry.

The review was a lot of fun to do, as it has tons to mock while still being enjoyable to me. That’s an nice combination, as a lot of my better reviews prove. The critiquing is fine, but the fun bits are more memorable with this one.

That;s pretty much all there is to say here.

Paranormal Entity

Oh yay, my so far only run in with the asylum. It was as lackluster as I expected. They have improved by just being crazy but this one came out when they just ripped off films and didn’t’ even try.

I hear some people actually legitimately like this one. Good for them, but I found it incredibly forgettable. It’s not terrible but everything it does right, PA did way better. It’s basically the same film only a lot weaker.

Again, I don’t remember anything but that’s a bad thing in this case. It just tries to hard to be like the movie it’s ripping film ,and while it has some okay scares, it’s mostly just a pointless bore. Not their worst, but not very good either.

The review is pretty good, for a mostly boring film PA films always give me stuff to riff, so it makes sense that this one has a lot to mock. Again, more notable for humor than the review itself, but that makes sense in this case. Although I do say “This wasn’t a good review.” so I guess it aged well.

Will I cover more Asylum fare? Eh, the only one I want to do is Sunday School Musical, for obvious reasons. Other reviews have done the other notable ones well enough, but we’ll see.

Paranormal Activity 4

Ripoffs are fine, but nothing will ever beat the original. Unless it’s the worst film in that franchise. Yeah, Marked Ones was bad, but it had it’s creative concepts. This was just….bleh.

Most of is just another dull found footage film, but the worst parts are how it contacts to the other films. None of the twists in this regard make any sense and as sequel, it really adds nothing,.

Except Kinnect product placement, of course.

I actually think I got it all right in the review, I just have grown to like it less with time. It’s not horrible, but it’s just a failure as a sequel, and is just weak as a film on it’s own. Kike I said, even Marked Ones had it’s good points, at least more than this one.

I hope the final one is better. I hear it’s not but I’m an optimist.

The review is good. As I said, PA gives me plenty to work with and the stupid story and twists just makes it even easier to make fun of. There’s good critique here as well, so it’s another well rounded one.

Good way the Halloween section of this, even if we already cover it with Return to Halloweentown back there.

Meet the Robinsons

I plan to do a little something regarding the Disney Animated Canon later this year, so I wasn’t sure if I should just say it all here or save it for there. So I’ll meet in the middle and say a bit but not go into too much detail. I said most of what I had to in the review but there is more to add in some places.

I did this before I felt it was a bit underrated and helped start Disney’s return to greatness, especially with the ending. It is interesting how Disney’s only got stronger after this review, due to the insane success of that ice movie people seem to like.

I still think this one is solid. It has it’s obligatory time travel plot holes, but the heart and humor really makes it solid. But the ending is best part, as it gives us a great moral and kind of leads into the modern Disney era quite nicely.

If there’s more to say, I’ll say it in that thing I’m planning. The review is a bit slow sometimes but it’s mostly good. It’s another positive review that I liked doing as I had a special reason for liking that was fun to get into.

Not a ton of funny reactions but like the movie, the heart saves it. So yeah, another fine one.

Green Lantern

I’m not sure why I wanted to do this review, but I did. I didn’t really care about the film either way, but I guess I just wanted to give it a fair chance. And I had the idea of the Ryan Renolds Double Feature after watching Change Up.

I like the film slightly more but it’s still just okay. It has plenty going for it and kind of be fun, but a lot of it just kind of dull and typical. It’s another that I have forgotten most of, which is a shame since I think it has all the ingredients needed for a really strong Green Lantern film.

It just doesn’t leave that much of an impact. It can be fun but it doesn’t quite hit in the way it should. Say what you will about Man of Steel, but there is a reason it struck a chord with audiences enough to start the DC Universe while this under performed.

It’s not bad, just not very good. The review is pretty good, as I make decent jokes and critiqued pretty well. This is an average film that I had plenty to say about at the time due its’and downs, and I think I did a fine job with.

But yeah, we should all be glad Renolds recently hit it big with Deadpool.

My Little Pony Friendship is Magic-The Mysterious Mare Do Well

…Oh god, this one. This is a review I kind of regret doing. Well, sort of. I stand by my stance on the episode at the time, but the stuff I say in the intro is awkward in hindsight. Yes, I felt that way at the time, no way to really change that.

But I do think I was a bit harsh. I mean I had previously bashed a Backyardigans episode. I am in no position to say people are being a bit too harsh on this show. I kind of see what I meant at the time, as some people can look too deeply and be a bit harsh.

I mean, some people get guringely offended at the content of a pony cartoon targeted at children. You should take your media seriously, but…there’s a limit. That’s why even if I’m bashing a moral, I’m sure to look at the intent first. See the difference between a Freaky Fido and a Review it Up.

The main review is fine, with good points and jokes and all that. It’s the other stuff that bugs me. It was fun to do a pony episode, but it could have been better. I actually do have something to add to the actual episode.

Inevitability, some people have come out in defense of this one. One argument is that rightfully knocks Rainbow Dash down a peg in a good way, as sometimes you will sadly kind of have to do that, and that’s kind of the real moral here.

That’s actually a good point. What they did was a harsh but in a way it had to be done, since she just wasn’t listening. However, I’m not sure if that was the writer intended. My problem is that it seems like they didn’t even think before doing this.

It is kind of harsh ,as we see with that big of her being alone. Yeah ,sometimes even people you love need to be knocked down a bit, but this is going a bit too far. The episode treats it like a normal happy ending, and what they did was just fine.

I like the idea here but the execution is on them muddled side. But that is a good point, even if I’m not sure the writer was going for that angle. As with her other episodes, there’s a mature idea here, she just needed to think it through. Still, this episode is just average with those good and bad elements. I do kind of see why it’s seen as the worst with those issues.

This review was an odd experiment that at least helped me learn a few things, and kind of lead to me analyzing the show a bit more. It might not be perfect, but it was a good learning experience at least.

The Change Up

This is another one I didn’t really need to do but I just wanted to. Usually film the films I say little about, I force myself to do them but this one, I wanted to do. Mostly because I thought it had some level of potential even if some people would just write it off.

And yeah, I still think that. It has good acting and some amusing moments and parts of it almost work. But in the end, it just becomes another typical modern comedy instead of anything that memorable.

Which again, is sad because it had decent potential. And being in the same year as another disappointing Ryan Renolds movie, just made it worse. This was an odd but fun double feature to do as it spotlight how a honestly talented actor can just have shit luck.

The review is fine. Not a lot of materiel, but you can tell I had stuff to say regarding the comedy, so I’d say I pulled this off pretty well due to the critiquing. So yeah, one of the better forgettable reviews.

Inappropriate Comedy

Yay. I tied this with Movie 43 on my Bottom 10, so you know I’m still not found of it. But honestly, I hate that one more. This one is way lazier, and more offensive on all counts. But it’s mostly just boring while that one kept pissing me off.

This film is worse written and is slightly less anger inducing. But it’s still terrible due to all the obvious reasons, so I can’t defend it at all. I happen to personally hate Movie 43 slightly more. That’s really all I can add to it, as I explained it pretty well in the review.

The review is pretty good. Again, some funny reactions but I don’t quite say as much as with Movie 43. That review stood out a bit more since I got angrier, while here I was just frustrated and bored. At least Movie 43 had variety, this movie just reuses the same unfunny skits over and over.

But I still made the best of it, and it’s another fun review to come to, even if it’s not as good as other reviews of my bottom 10.

Fred Claus

We start our last stretch with our Christmas reviews! I had done a few in 2012, but not a ton so I made up for it from that point on. While only 1 from 2012 was for Red Ribbon Reviewers, they all were this time, That was cool to start taking part in. Anyway, another film I barely remember. Most people don’t recall it but I heard about it and figure it would be fun to do. From what I recall, it’s just a mediocre film that had a neat idea but didn’t’ go anywhere too memorable with it, aside from a pretty great Santa.

Outside of that, nothing stands out too much about it. It’s not terrible either, it’s just not very good. As such, the review is in the middle. Not exactly a ton of amazing points or jokes, but I there was some good points, jokes and critiques. It’s not them most memorable, but it’s good enough to come back to sometimes.

A fair way to begin Christmas for 2013.

Eight Crazy Nights

For whatever reason, Nostalgia Critic, me and Cartoon Hero decided to do this film all in the same month. It’s freaky how that turns out. Although I wll admit I kind of did this one when I hear Cartoon Hero would do it, and given my new thoughts on it, I thought it would be interesting to explore.

Because I stand by it being a…mixed bag. It has some amusing parts, but also terrible gross jokes. It has nice animation and has some actual heart, but also forces it sometimes and screws up a few aspects.

I do think there’s a bit more than people might think ,as it seems like they are really trying in some scenes, but then it goes back to crass crap. It’s almost equally decent and bad, always switching.

My review was all over the place, but so was the movie! I just it was flat out terrible so I could hate it, but no, it had to have redeeming values! I get why plenty of people dislike it, but I do think it’s not as bad as some say. It has SOME good things in the writing, that put waaaay above a lot of Sandler turds.

The heart is way more believable than anything in Jack and Jill, I’ll say that much. The review is another favorite, since I perfectly capture my complex things. I make plenty of good comments with fun reactions, while also really looking at the pros and cons.

It’s another good balance that I think makes it a solid one. Most reviews of this film are fairly negative, and while some mention good things, I think it’s good that I tried to push the positives, while really harping on the negatives.

Good for what is technically my only Hanukkah special.

Good Luck Charlie, It’s Christmas!

OBGLIATORY DCOM TIME! This was, I think, my first look at the ones based on the sitcoms, not counting Hannah since it was in theaters. This one is the most low key and is more or less an extended episode, but it’s still enjoyable.

It may not be epic but it’s just a bit of fun with some real heart to make it even better. It’s not the shows best work or anything, but it’s just plain charming and amusing. It is less flawed than the others, but less impressive. That all evens it out to make for a fun enough Christmas film, that represents the show nicely.

The review is another one that’s in the middle. A bit dull but enjoyable enough with good comments overall decent critiques. Like the film itself, it’s not exactly grand, but it is a nice. A fun remedy after Sandler crapped on our holidays.

The Search for Santa Paws

But let’s go back to that buddies pile. I wasn’t sure if I had plans to do the spin off when I started Buddies but when I did decided to do it, I still wasn’t sure when to do them and I just did them after the main movies to serve as part of my Christmas specials.

This one is in that middle ground when it comes to those films. Half bad, half mediocre. It gets pretty painful with the orphans, but other stuff is either just kind of dull, or almost works. I think without 5 or so annoying dogs, the whole thing comes across as slightly more tolerable, allowing for more okay elements.

But the whole is still bad, it just has moments that work a bit better. Half of it was a godsend compared to the others, and the other half was about equally as bad. Meh. The review is pretty good. This is another film ripe for mockery, so I had plenty to work with on both levels, making it for a pretty solid review.

I do kind of feel bad for mocking that Santa Buddies kid with the voice. I mean, I’m sure she’s nice but the directors gave her some horrible direction to work from. I think that’s not even her real voice, they just made her as annoying as possible. And what the hell is Applebloom doing in this?!

But yeah, I’m glad I only had one damn dog film to do after this one.

Special Agent Oso-The Living Holiday Lights

I’m skimming this one, as I went into the episode again in my Disney Cartoon Christmas post. So I’ll quickly discuss the review. I did it just to share an episode that has the shows usual flaws, while also almost being good. The review is mostly kind of pointless as I didn’t exactly have a lot to say, but there was enough amusing stuff to make this an okay review.

That’s…pretty much all I got.

Santa with Muscles

And now we begin my other 2013 sort of story arc. Even reviewers have to do A Christmas Carol so I thought I’d do it. I just hand this random idea. The whoel bit of doing past and present bad films was just a fun idea, I didn’t really have a moral in mind, as I had made that point before.

It also gave me an excuse to explore these films, as each one I did want to do, especially this one. In the grand scheme of things, it’s nowhere close to the worst film ever, as it’s not really offensive, but it’s really disappointing.

It should be dumb fun, but it’s mostly just…boring. It’s bogged down by cutest orhapn shit. That stuff is so cliché it should add to it but it makes more dull than it needed to be. You have Hulk Hogan as Santa, what more do you need?!

But like I said, it’s pretty harmless. Just another bad Hulk Hogan movie. The review was plenty of fun to do given the nature of the film so I had good jokes all that. I think I nailed the films flaws and had some decent fun with it.

A fine way to begin my Christmas carol. Also, it still amazes me that Brenda Song was in this.

The Santa Clause 3

A tradition on this blog is for me to review a film thinking it will be horrible, only for it to just be mediocre. This is a classic case of that. It’s a pretty lame sequel, but it’s mostly just a mediocre sequel…following on another mediocre sequel.

 

Once again , I don’t remember too much about except it a really lame ending and a waste of some decent plot points. It’s just really tired and lacking a lot of the enjoyment that the first film had, or even the 2nd one for that matter.

It’s far from awful but it’s a pretty pointless film at the end of the day. Again, there really isn’t much to say in hindsight, as I covered everything well in the review. A review that is fine due to the usual good jokes, but it is clear I don’t have ton to work with.

A serviceable review, just not my best one. Still, this was a good choice for our present turd, and it is fitting I gave the past one a worse review.

A Very Harold and Kumar 3D Christmas

Once again, I went deep into the film in the best list, so I can just go over the review. It’s another favorite positive review of mine, because of how passionate I was. I really went into why it works and even made room for some funny reactions.

It was a perfect one to review for Christmas, as it captures the spirit, but in an odd way that oddly hits me more due to being combined with a crazy style I happen to like. Like to movie, I strike a pretty good balance. I think it’s the best of my main Christmas reviews, but that’s just me.

Overall, a great way to celebrate Christmas. And FINALLY, we end with..

New Year’s Eve

Hey, this guy has a new movie out now, perfect timing! If it’s anything like this, I would avoid it. I tend to like stories that follow many people, with little stories instead of just one big one. But this movie goes a bit overboard.

It has so many stories that you just don’t care. By the end, none of it matters and pretty much none of them are that interesting. It’s not painful or anything, but it’s so dull and just doesn’t stick with you.

It’s an example of a film that got worse when I finished then when I was watching it. Still not horrible, but pretty dull and just…pointless. It’s an odd type of film to review in my style, but I think I managed to make it work. But if you want a better review, Film Brain has a good one.

As for mine, it’s another middling one but it can be blamed on the format. But I don’t regret doing it, since I had good jokes. It’s fine, just not one I come back to. Still, it’s a solid way to end 2013.

 

And those were my 2013 Reviews! This took a lot longer than it should have, and it came down to the wire. I’m sorry a lot of these were short, but there’s only so much to say. This maybe wasn’t the best idea but I did it, so I must finish them off.

Overall, this was a great year for me with plenty of variety and a lot of gems, as well as some amazing turds. This is where I got into my groove and knew what I wanted to do with the blog, even if I’m still not perfect.

Guess we’ll tune in later for the final year in this retrospective, 2014, where things got pretty messy but we’ll get to that. My deadline is the date of my final weekly review in June, so I don’t have to worry too much about deadlines. I promise not to use it as an excuse to slack off with it.

Watch it be broken. Either way, hope you enjoyed this look and we’ll see how 2014 panned out.

See ya.

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About Spongey444

I'm 20 and I'm a slightly below average man who can barely spell. I mostly spend my time watching TV and movies, hence why i ended doing a blog all about those things. I tend to have weird tastes, but I like think I'm just fair on things.
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