Hello, Spongey here
Since I’m looking at Goosebumps, I wanted to look at everything I can. Leave no stone unturned!
I think you know of this beast called “Fanfiction”. You know, it can be good or bad? Yeah, that. Goosebumps has that. Being a 20 year old “beloved” book series, it’s not shocking many people wanted to tell their Goosebumps stories
So let’s see what horrible stuff comes out of this
This is Goosebumps Fanfiction
Being an anthology series, there are some fics that are normal stories, done in a Goosebump-y style. I’ll MOSTLY ignore those, since they don’t count.
First, let us look at the two most well-known, or at least the only ones TV Tropes recommends.
This one is interesting. It has nothing to do with Goosebumps outside of some nods, and a cameo from Stine himself. …he dies in chapter one.
But it’s still good!
,fifteen-year-old Courtney McRaven Keller, along with her widowed mother and her Annoying Younger Sibling Max, have just moved to Amityville. Moving to a new house, with a nod to a classic film? This IS goosebumps!
Courtney has a hard time adjusting, but then again, she has always been a loner and she’s never really made any friends.
However, her life changes forever when applies to work at a Halloween store. The store owner, John D. Stranger, (lol) hires her on the spot, gives her a book, and essentially tells her that her job is to make sure no one ever reads the book aloud,. Guess what happens.
So the book turns out to be a Sealed Evil in a Can that housed a slew of dangerous and evil monsters. It turns out, however, that Courtney is also The Chosen One, and now, with the help of her newly-formed Nakama, (who call themselves the Night-Bumpers), she must re-capture the creatures and re-seal them into the book.
Not much to say. It’s fun, well written and nothing like Goosebumps, but I love the little nods here and there.
This is so popular, someone did a fanfic of it. FANFICCEPTIOn. That fic…is a crossover…with the little mermaid.
Anyway…not much to say. It’s really cool
Oh hell yes! This fic has yet to really be “started”, the part being shown is basically a promo. But it’s great!
The basic story is basically like Dissidia: Final Fantasy, taking heroes and villains from the first sixteen Goosebumps books (except it takes Slappy and Amy from Night of the Living Dummy II) and pitting them against one another, with the heroes taking the side of Paloma, the goddess of love and desire, while the villains taking the side of Mr. Dawes, the god of fear and hatred.
Yeah, it’s great. We have amazing moments with the heroes arguing. And the pairings lead to funny moments. Check out my fave it:
“Man, I didn’t ask for any of this!” Evan complained loudly.
“Oh, just shut up and deal with it!” Lizzy nagged back at him”
Making fun of Evan’s whiny-ness? Yay
Simply put, it Is fun to see these characters bounce off each other. Though, some villains are used that should be dead (Mr Mortman, Dr Brewer, Will, Sarabeth, and Ray) but it doesn’t matter, cuz they’re awesome.
Also, Dr Shreek is used instead of Toggle. Why? Word of god:
“but I just couldn’t resist adding him so he can shout “BEAUTIFUL HANDS!” at every opportunity.”
Oh, and check out this line
“”Y’know, pal, that’s starting to sound REALLY pedo!” the ventriloquist dummy pointed out.
“You are not one to talk, Slappy! Exactly why is it that you always try to enslave pre-teen girls?” a completely shadowy figure jumped in.”
I love this fic.
Speaking of villains, why is Uncle Al used? Not complaining…but he wasn’t a villain. Either way. This story Is fun and awesome.
With that done, let’s look at…less amazing stories. Some okay, some bad.
Goosebumps Deep Trouble: The Beginning
This one is interesting. We have a kid, who lives in our world. He looks for GB books at the library and finds Deep trouble. It’s blank. But suddenly, he’s sucked into it.
So an interesting idea. But why DT? No idea . anyway, this guy has not read GB, so the fun is seeing him not know whats going on. But I think it’d be more fun if he HAD read it. whatever.
It only has two chapters, but you know, I like it. It is the most recent story up. Hope it gets good!
Yep, a sequel to My Hairiest Adventure, about Jasper. It has only one chapter, but it’s alright. It’s mostly a rehash of the first one…which means it’s the perfect Goosebumps sequel.
Not much to say about this one, really. We have our basic backstory about the now teenage human Jasper. It’s a neat idea, and I hope it turns out well
Slave To Passion
Okay, let’s talk about the most odd trend ever.
In Goosebumps fics, you will notice one plot trend: Slappy gets owner…AND THEY FUCK.
Seriously, Slappy gets major draco In leather pants. It is fucking disturbing. Of course, Stine brought this on himself when he wrote Bride of the living dummy, but I digress.
They are a lot of fics like this. But this one has a lot of reviews and shit for some reason. Let us look!
You know the drill, girl gets slappy, brings him to life. Now for how they fuck…okay, this one doesn’t seem to have fucking. But it does have romance. Yuck!
Also, someone LOOKS UP those words. They mean “You and I are one now”. I looked it up…and got nothing. Some people say it means this, but I think it means jack shit. Google translate gives me nothing. So he actually gets his slave here. Unlike any GB character, she does nothing.
Oh, and he turns human using a plot device spell. Most Slappy stories have him turning human so he can fuck properly
Oh, and we get Goosebumps character cameos! Like…Lacie from don’t go to sleep? Sure And…shane and shana from Attack of the Jack o lanterns. What. Then we get..
Della from curse of camp cold lake?! Yeah, Slappy knows all the villains for some reason. One cameo that makes sense is Mary ellen from Bride of the living dummy. Go look that one up.
So yeah…they fall in love. Then at one point…we see Britney from “Revenge of the living dummy”
Infact, all of Slappy’s former “slaves’ meet! It’s kind of neat, to be honest,. You see, the only way to kill Slappy once and for all is to have all his former “slaves’ team up. So they treck to Roxxy (the new chick)’s house to kill Slappy. But they kinda have to actually…plan.
Oh, and he ends up catching wind of the other kids, but doesn’t too much. But he does…kiss Kris an Llindy in their sleep
…BRAIN BLEACH PLEASE~!
Then the others…drop out of the story. Slappy and Roxxy…get married. ULTIMATE WHAT.
I have no context. It’s gross IN context! It says she can’t do anything about it, but this after THREE years! You think she’d stop him by now!
Then she dies of drug overdose. What. Yeah…that’s how it ends.
Slappy is…sad. The other former slaves wish they weren’t idiots. Its’ all sad and shit. So there’s that story. It’s so bad I almost did an entire blog on it!
Dumb story, next!
It Came From Beneith the Sink: The Lanx Problem
Yes, that is the real title. Anyway, finally a sequel I want…but it isn’t too good. It starts where the first one left off, with lanx biting kat.
This one is so short. All that happens, is that they randomly try putting Fungus oil on it..and it works.
..Then it latches onto dad’s face. End.
Confession time: …This was mine. I wrote it like a year ago under a different account. It…isn’t too great. I will redo it some day.
Anyway, this is a direct MB sequel…from Andy’s pov. Yeah, I like the idea. It retcons the 4th one, since it sucks. It takes place about 2 years after MB 3, where Andy has finally come back home after her parents stopped being awful.
“Evan seemed ok at first them I learned he was a whiny kid with no likable traits what so ever.”
…Sorry, I had to.
It …only had one chapter. It’s just recap. I think…I’ll redo this one. Uh…NEXT!
Dummy or not I will always love you
Yep, another one!
Basic at first. Joey (yes, a girl) gets sSappy, and brings him to life. Oh, and she’s emo. Yay. Some green moon bullshit makes him human. Gee, at least the other one had a better reason!
See, they of course fall in love. But before All That happens. Slappy tells her he must find true love to be a perma human. Why she doesn’t kick him out at first is beyond me
Oh, then Jimmy and Mary Ellen from bride show up. Cuz why not? Stuff happens, and it’s really boring.
Anyway…the story ends with Slappy becoming human and…THERE’S A SEQUEL!? Yeah,. That wasn’t a good enough ending so we have part 2
Slappy lives with Jimmy o james. As his son. Sure. They do loving stuff and it’s even more boring. Her brother Brad rightly goes “DUDE, YOU’RE DATING A FORMER DUMMY” and I have no idea if the parents know he was a dummy.
Brad spreads lies about her cheating on Slappy., and they plan revenge. Whatever. They tell Brad’s GF he cheated on her. So he does something smart and is punished. Yay?
That night, they sleep in bed-
“It wasn’t long before he thrusted himself into me.”
Ew. Yep, they fuck. Yay.
“leez review! And pleez don’t think I’m perverted,”
I..think I’ll stop talking about this one. Part 3 is the same shit
Calling all creeps sequel? YES!
It starts where the first one left off, as ricky is now a creep, and iris must stop them. Sadly, it has only one chapter. But it’s damn good so far!
“”Because Iris, as a human I had nothing. I was ridiculed by everybody in this school. Everybody. Can you honestly think of anyone that actually treated me like I was worth something?”
“Iris looked back at him and said, “I did Ricky. I did.
…Damn. You just made this book better. THAT’S POSSIBLE?!
Anyway, it has iris being badass, but sadly we have no idea if she lives. This story was made in 2010, so chapter 2 is not likely. Still good though!
Calling All Creeps II
Yay, another one!
This is like 40 years later. Ricky took over the world with the creeps. He married Creep!Iris and had a kid, named Shay. The remaining humans live on the land, like Indians.
This one is meh. Kind of dull, not too interesting, and it’s..eh. after a bit, you can’t even tell this is about creeps. I only mention this cuz of the creep thing.
Monster Blood, Again
Let us look at the author’s note
“As debating whether or not to do a serious, Fear Street audience adaptation of the Monster Blood series or to just do a parody. Luckily, I chose the latter.”
…This should be fun.
“I like to think the Goosebumps books are already subtle parodies”
…So much same.
Sadly, this one chapter is not parody. It just has Evan years later, thinking about the blood. Dull. I was excited for this one! Lame,
Three kids and a slappy
This may be the worst GB fic I have read. Yes, worse than Slappy getting fucked. Let’s look at the basics. It is in script form. That’s fine but…read on
It starts out fine.. It starts with a kid and a goosebumps convention. Yep, it’s gonna be meta!
He says he loves GB, and he sees a stand with a bunch of copies of one book, headed by a dude in a skeleton costume
“sn’t that the coolest Goosebumps book you ever read?”
“ Not really. Actually, I hate this Goosebumps book”
“I don’t like you.”
” Well… I don’t like you, either.”
“ How much are the cameras?”
“Well… the cameras are free to fans like you, but since I don’t like you, I’m gonna charge you.”
…Troy, is that you?
He goes to the Slappy stand..and says he’s never read a Slappy book. WORST FAN EVER. He knows nothing about Slappy other than he comes to life. Lame!
He ends up getting a slappy doll for free. He sees the card with the words…and reads them. He doesn’t know the words or anything. Again, worst fan ever.
The rest has…goths who like Spongebob, Slappy wanting to marry THE LITTLE FUCKING SISTER, AND POV CHANGES FOR NO REASON! I don’t know It’s just…ugh.
Can’t sell the badness, just look it up.
This is where I end things. Actually, there’s another good one. “Red Blood” a proper Monster blood sequel with Sara beth! Oh and..Conan/andy. Look it up, it’s good!
So check out the good fics, avoid the shit ones.