Goosebump a thon #49: Vampire Breath

Hello, Spongey here

 

Welcome back to Goosebump-athon!

Vampire Breath

Image

 

Cover:  badass. I love the look of the vampire, and it really fits the book well

                                            

Front Tagline: “open wide and say…mouthwash!” LAME

Back Tagline:  “He’s a dentist nightmare”. Eh, better.

Summary:

Freddy is babysitting his neighbor Tyler and telling him a spooky story about how werewolves will come up behind you and breathe down your neck.

It only makes sense to start a Vampire book with werewolves

Freddy climaxes his horrifying story by ruthlessly tickling the poor kid, following that action by turning to tickle his female best friend, Cara, who came over to keep Freddy company. The two wrestle around and then Freddy talks some more about how creepy werewolves are. As Freddy talks about the soft thud of the werewolf’s feet, the kids hear a soft thud of footsteps from within the house. It’s not really a werewolf at all, but Tyler’s parents.

“give me a break, the werewolf said’

They don’t like freddy scaring tyler, but they don’t just..fire him, and give him the money.

 

Back at Freddy’s house, he and Cara pass the time by playing some air hockey in the basement. Freddy then tells us they are tough. How tough?

“We like it when the teacher scratches the chalk’

Badass

 The game quickly devolves into an actual hockey match as the two kids punch and shove each other around the small room. Freddy pushes Cara into the wall and the two playfully wrestle each other. Eventually Cara accidentally knocks over the large china cabinet, revealing a hidden door. Behind the door the two kids discover a dark tunnel. Reasoning that if you find a secret door leading to a secret tunnel in your basement, you’re required to investigate where it leads, the two kids grab some flashlights and make their way down the damp stone tunnel.

At the end of the tunnel they find a small room holding an empty coffin. Freddy picks up a small glass bottle inside the coffin. Guess what it’s called.

 The two kids fight over opening the glass bottle, leading them to drop the container. The bottle spills open, spewing out noxious smoke.

As the smoke clears, the two kids spy a form inside the coffin: an old man! The bald ghoul blinks his eyes awake and slowly climbs out of the coffin. He announces that he’s Count Nightwing, a prominent vampire, and he is very thirsty.

I’d make a twilight joke, but I’m above that.

 The vampire chases the two kids down the tunnel, trapping them at the end when the entry door swings shut. Freddy figures ladies first and lets Count Nightwing attack his friend first, but Nightwing quickly recoils from Cara’s neck after he realizes he doesn’t have his fangs.

 Count Nightwing gets furious and makes the kids help him look for the bottle of Vampire Breath they opened.

The Vampire Breath is a magical potion that vampires live on. It freshens their breath, restores memory, and keeps them alive.

 It also  brought Count Nightwing into the future from his own time, and if the kids help him find the bottle, he’ll go back to his time and leave them alone. Eventually they find and open the bottle, but the two kids are more than a little miffed to discover that they’ve been brought back in time with Count Nightwing.

 Once the fumes fade away, Cara and Freddy find themselves in a large room inside what appears to be a castle. The two kids try to escape, only to run into Count Nightwing, who is awfully sorry about transporting them back to his time. He tells the kids he’d be happy to help them by turning them into vampires. Freddy and Cara decline the generous offer, but Count Nightwing is insistent that the two help him find his bottle of Vampire Breath. See, the empty bottle was empty in 1996 (they don’t say it, but the copyright info says 1996 so there) , but in 1896, it’s full of Vampire Breath.

Count Nightwing explains that every vampire must supplement their diet of blood with daily doses of Vampire Breath. A vampire’s private dose of Vampire Breath is highly guarded and kept hidden from the other vampires, only Count Nightwing can’t remember where he hid his bottle or his fangs. The count forces the kids to help him look around the castle for the potion. Freddy and Cara split from the count and reason that if they find his bottle of Vampire Breath first, they can use it to zap themselves back to the future.

“I have a better idea!”

Yes, cara?

“let’s get out of here!”

…eh, I don’t think that’ll work

Unfortunately, all of the windows are either too high or outfitted with black bars to prevent burglars from stealing valuable vampires. They hide In the kitchen. Inside the kitchen, they spot a window without bars!

Freddy jumps up on the ledge and prepares to jump out when he notices his feet are not making contact with the ground. He looks down and sees that the castle is built high atop a cliff. Freddy is saved from falling to his death by a giant bat, which swoops him up back into the kitchen. The man bat transforms back into Count Nightwing, who chides the children on trying to escape and tells them to get back to work looking for his bottle.

The kids keep checking room after room in the cavernous castle. Finally they come across another mausoleum lined with empty coffins– except for one with its lid clamped firmly shut. Inside a hidden pocket in the coffin they find the bottle of Vampire Breath. Before they can make their escape, the two are stopped by a twelve-year-old girl with curly blonde hair.

She introduces herself as Gwendolyn and explains that Count Nightwing and the other vampires keep her prisoner in the castle, forcing her to clean their coffins under the threat of turning her into a vampire. Gwendolyn leads the kids down a secret passageway in the castle so they can escape and be spared her ordeal. Once she gets the kids deep within the castle walls, the blonde girl reveals her fangs and attempts to feast on the two friends.

Before Gwendolyn can sink her teeth into Freddy’s neck, Count Nightwing, the master of convenient timing, shows up and the 12-year-old vampire girl and the old man vampire duke it out.

Oh and that entire bit? Pointless. Doesn’t add much and it is never mentioned again . BLAM much?

Freddy and Cara quietly slink out of the passageway and find themselves in a supply closet loaded with empty bottles of Vampire Breath. Count Nightwing shows up and thanks the kids for reminding him where he hid his full bottle: among the empties in the closet. As Nightwing furiously searches for his bottle among the spent vessels, the two kids find it first. But then Count Nightwing swipes it. But then Cara swipes it back and the two kids play Monkey in the Middle with the vampire. Their game goes back and forth over the vampire’s head until Count Nightwing simply floats up in the air and grabs the bottle.

He could have done that in the first place…just sayin’

Only that bottle too is empty, as Freddy made a switch.

Freddy opens the bottle of Vampire Breath and is relieved to see his air hockey table through the thinning smoke. He and Cara are however not relieved to see Count Nightwing came back with them. Nightwing pouts around the basement and complains that he still doesn’t have his fangs and he’ll starve to death without them. Just then, Freddy’s parents barge down the basement stairs.

“it’s a vampire, guys!”

Twist Ending:

“oh there you are!”

Wut

“Freddy…this Is your grandfather”

..
“You’re a vampire”

WHAT A TWEEST.

. Freddy is surprised that not only does he have a grandfather he never knew about, he has a vampire grandfather that his parents kept buried in a secret passageway behind the china cabinet. And before you ask how this works, both the parents and nightwing are 100 years old.

Wait…there’s another twist?

Freddy and Cara sneak off to the hidden basement bathroom and lock themselves inside. Soon, before the two begin wrestling again, Cara discovers a bottle marked “Werewolf Sweat.” Cara spills the bottle over the both of them and they begin to loudly growl.

…meh, weak ending to a good book. But I love the vampire twist!

TV Episode:  

Did the writers even READ the book?

They keep freddy the vampire, nightwing itself, and the idea of the breath. That is all.

Freddy and Cara are siblings. What. Their last name is Reinfeld…okay that’s clever.  And then they find the breath is the normal way, but instead of time travel, they fall in some liar, which gets no explanation

Then they run into Gwendolyn, who is important here. The rest is just them trying to hide with Gwen. Yes, the vampire thing with her happens, but we see what he does to her: turns her into a bug.

The ending is the same, though their fans grow in right away, and it ends with them going to bed…in their new coffins.

It’s  a good episode, with a fun performance by nightwing. I just dislike the changes

Notable Lines: “we do it all the time, especially when my parents aren’t home”

 

Useless Fact:: the chick who plays Clara has gone on to be the female star of Jumper…which also stars good ol’ Zane from living dummy 2!

Final Thoughts:  yay, a good one! I don’t know why Stine never does vampire books outside of Fear Street, since Vampires are more suited for Goosebumps. Either way, this book rules. The vampire is classic, the idea is good, I like how they mess wit the vampire mythos, and the writing is very strong. Despite the BLAM, this Is a strong entry in the series.

Grade: A

 

See ya!

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About Spongey444

I'm 20 and I'm a slightly below average man who can barely spell. I mostly spend my time watching TV and movies, hence why i ended doing a blog all about those things. I tend to have weird tastes, but I like think I'm just fair on things.
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