Hello, Spongey here
Welcome back to Goosebump-athon!
A Shocker on Shock Street
Cover: pretty cool. I like the giant mantis. That is all
Front Tagline: “It’s a real dead end”
Back Tagline: “talk about shock treatment!”
Erin Wright and her best friend Marty are big fans of a series of horror movies made under the Shock Street banner. As the book opens, they are attending a screening of Shock Street 5. At one point in the film. A crab dude grabs a kid .the audience…laughs
At the films end, the monsters are eaten and dipped in gravy by the town. The audience cheers. “it was a great ending!”
…you make your own joke
Luckily for Erin, her father happens to be the designer of the new studio theme park for Shock Street! Erin’s father has designed an intricate system of robotics for the new theme park attraction and he wants Erin and Marty to be the first kids ever to tour the park.
Erin asks Dad is mom will come with them. He stares and then goes” uh..no”. you will see why I mention this, later.
Erin and Marty are dropped off at the theme park and are introduced to their tour guide Linda. She hands the kids red toy guns and informs them that they are special monster-freezing guns. She then drops one of the guns and it fires off on her and she pretends to be frozen.
Did you think that was dumb and pointless? Well yay, you just read the entire book condensed into one scene
Erin and Marty are told that they will be the only ones on the tour, which is led through the entire park on a tracked tram. The tram first leads the kids through a haunted house, which then turns into an indoor roller coaster. The trams are not fitted with safety belts and the two kids almost fall out of the carts to their deaths.
After the kids exit the haunted house, and in the only funny/good scene their tram is approached by various “stars” of the Shock Street movies, including Ape-Face and a man who looks like a toad. The stars sign autographs for the kids.
The dialogue is actually kind of funny in this bit, but I won’t attempt to remember any of it.
the tram enters “the Cave of the Living Creeps!” Upon entering the cave, large snake-sized white worms drop on the kids, followed by a trip through a giant spider web filled with hundreds of crawling, real spiders. When the tram stalls in the middle of the cave, the two kids get out and decide to walk to find an exit, only to find themselves surrounded by a half-dozen giant praying mantises.
The praying mantises spit hot sticky tar at the kids, until Erin has the brilliant idea that to stop the mantises, they need to step on them, like with real insects.
…I have no idea what to say to that.
After kicking away the giant mantises, the kids finally exit the cave and find themselves on a to-scale representation of the Shock Street, which is a locale featured repeatedly in the series of films these two enjoy.
Marty decides to visit the graveyard. Marty falls in an open grave and as Erin attempts to fish him out, hundreds of green hands thrust out of the ground in all directions. The hands pin Marty to the ground and Erin kicks away at them, with the two kids both losing their shoes and socks in the process of freeing Marty. As they run to escape the cemetery, they decide that they need to find the main service road so they can find their way back to the main studio building.
Okay, you may have noticed this books pattern?;
Kids go to location. Scary thing happens. They run. It’s not mentioned except in the general sense
Erin spots an elevated stone wall to assist in being able to spot the road from a higher vantage point. As the kids hop barefoot towards the wall, they get trapped in quicksand.
The two kids sink down to their noses and death is certain until they are rescued by two werewolves, who pull them out of the mud.
Read that again.
Good, we’re both sober
The two werewolves are Wolf Girl and Wolf Boy, two more stars of the Shock Street series. The kids try to reason with the stars of the attraction, but after the wolves try to eat the kids, they realize that they’re not actors or robots at all, but actual monsters.
Erin and Marty make it to the top of the wall and the wolves try jumping up to snatch the kids repeatedly. Erin finds one of the red toy guns they were given and aims it at the monsters; however it turns out to be useless junk.
I love red herrings, don’t you?
I also love that this book is nothing but them doing stupid crap that is only connected by this vague location. Great writing.
The two kids fall backwards on the other side of the wall at the same convenient time that the wolves make their way to the top of the wall. The two kids spot their tram moving quickly in the distance and they try to run to catch it. As Erin and Marty are running towards the tram, the wolves are in hot pursuit of the kids. The two manage to jump into the last streetcar of the tram and they speed away past the wolves in triumph.
But the tram is full of skeletons, and is headed right towards a giant stone castle! The two kids jump out just in time as the tram crashes through the stone wall
The two kids run around a little while until they find themselves back on the street they call Shock, cursing themselves because they got there too late.
Okay, you ready? Cuz I’m not
“Cut!” Yells the director, who then walks over to the two kids and tells them how successful filming has gone.
Erin is confused and she wants to see her dad. The director tells the kids that all they have to do is run through “Shockro’s House of Shocks” and take a left and they’ll find Erin’s dad.
Of course they don’t who this director guy is and why he’s here, and what is going on.
Erin knows from watching the movies that the entryway to Shockro’s House of Shocks would normally cause anyone entering to be killed instantly by thousands of volts of powerful electricity. The director explains that the kids have nothing to fear because this is a movie set after all..
Marty runs towards the house with Erin right behind him. Erin looks behind her and sees that the director has a giant plug running through his back– HE’S A ROBOT! She screams to stop Marty but she’s too late and he enters the house and is hit with a powerful shock that drops him to the ground. Erin runs after him to save him. As she runs over to the body, she sees her dad inside the building. But then she realizes it’s not really her dad at all.
Okay, good suspense. What’s going on? I can’t wait to see how evil this dad is. What will the twist be?!
And that’s when her speech slurs and grounds to a halt. Both the Marty and Erin robots have stopped working correctly. Erin’s “Dad,” the robotics expert, tells his co-workers that they just need some new chips and then the robotic kids will be fine to finish testing out the theme park.
WHAT THE FU-
*one mental breakdown later*&
You cannot tell me I read this book for that piece of shit twist?! You put us through random bullshit, just to make them ROBOTS?! That’s lazy. Even Robbie Rotten isn’t this lazy! You have to be fucking kidding me. You just have to!
Okay, these writers deserve a medal. They can make a shit book into a decent episode!
First, they change most of the stuff that happens. It’s not quite as dumb and feels slightly more ‘realistic”. Also when the tram appears, it says
“Rider beware….you’re in for a scare”
Anyway, let’s skip to how they handle the twist..
They turn out to be robots, and are turned off. The dude is working on a new model when.. the old ones turn on
“we don’t like being deactivated. Everything wants to live. Even robots”
They attack him.
I love this ending. So badass! It should have been its own episode!
Fun episode either way
Notable Lines: none
Useless Fact: the episode’s opening scene has dad’s workroom,. Where all the robot heads are actually reused props (the haunted mask, for example)
It sucks. It’s lazy, poorly written, and it’s just random crap happening, with an awful twist that leaves you wondering why you just read this. It could have been decent. I like the idea for a film series’ monsters coming to life, and I love Amusement park gone wrong stories. But this book does it all wrong. It’s not only BAD, it’s a waste of a good idea.